Episode Report Card M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Let's Give The Boy A Hand
By M. Giant | Season 3 | Episode 24 | Aired on 05.24.2004
A cop herds more passengers, including Wild Card, into a line to search their belongings. Other lines form nearby. Wild Card, at the back of his line, furtively snaps open a switchblade, then hides it in his pocket. Just because you're part of a plot to kill millions and overthrow the government doesn't mean you should be careless with your pocket lining. From some distance off, Kiefer notices the shiftiness, which starts the Kief-dar pinging. Kiefer looks away briefly, thinking hard. Ah, so that's where Spawn gets it. When Kiefer looks back, Wild Card is gone. Uh oh. Kiefer asks the cop at the head of the line what happened to Wild Card, but the cop doesn't know. You know what they say about things you want done right, Kiefer. Kiefer draws his weapon and dashes off in search of Wild Card, Special Agent Charlie Brown coming along to give him a hand. What they find -- two uniformed officers dead at the foot of an escalator to the surface -- isn't encouraging. It looks like Wild Card is out in the open. And he's capable of knifing two armed and alert LAPD officers to death without either of them making a sound. Kiefer calls CTU for a ride and heads up the escalator, Special Agent Charlie Brown in a handy position right behind him. There's also a dead civilian at sidewalk level. They didn't have cops guarding the entrance topside? They were just letting people get on the escalator going down so the cops could send them back up again? Sloppy. Someone tells Kiefer that he just missed the carjacking. Concerned pedestrians are crowded around the victim. I don't believe there are this many pedestrians at any given time in the entire greater Los Angeles area, let alone concerned ones. One of the witnesses tells Kiefer that Wild Card went that-a-way, and Kiefer reminds his earpiece that he needs that ride now. Sure enough, a CTU valet pulls up in a brand-new Sport Utility Kiefmobile. Having spent a couple of days in L.A., I can assure you that the only way to get a vehicle in place that fast is to park it there before you need it. Kiefer and Special Agent Charlie Brown hit the road, Kiefer barking orders over his communicator. They're looking for the vehicle belonging to the carjacking victim, whose name they know as a result of Special Agent Charlie Brown having looted the corpse's wallet. Nice to see he has things well in hand, but what an ignominious end for the last person into this season's Death Pool. It's 12:24:15.
12:28:28. Kiefer drives, Los Angeles traffic teems on a CTU monitor, Potato Face scans, and Soul Patch's interrogation continues. Bitchelle calls Hammer out of the meeting, stealing an encouraging peek at her husband in the process. She's up to something. Bitchelle tells Hammer about Wild Card's return to the wild. Hammer is pissed, but Bitchelle tells him about what they're setting up to find the car he stole. She further tells him that the only way they're going to find Wild Card is with Soul Patch's help. Actually, I think Adam the Woman Hater has the most proven automobile-location skills, but Bitchelle is also hoping to give hubby a shot at redemption, I'm thinking. Hammer doesn't think it's such a great idea to put a confessed traitor in CTU's driver's seat, but Bitchelle insists that Soul Patch is the only person who can do it. She drives the point home: "So unless you want to take responsibility and run Tactical yourself…" Good move. That's how you get your way with a bureaucrat -- appeal to his sense of Cover Your Ass. Hammer tells Soul Patch he's needed on the floor. Bitchelle sighs as she sends Soul Patch her most powerful "don't screw this up" vibes.