Episode Report Card Erin: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Stow it, Sydney
By Erin | Season 4 | Episode 7 | Aired on 02.15.2005
So. Monte Carlo. The Appleseed Gang are setting up shop in their hotel room. Nadia's dressed as a maid. Weiss walks up, sees her name tag, and comments that he doesn't really buy her as a "Gretchen." Nadia turns and smartasses something at him in German. Weiss is all, whoa. Okay. I stand corrected. And you're hot. Syd checks her watch and tells everyone it's showtime and they have one hour to surveil the room, get in, get the thorine intel, and get the hell out. Nadia moves into position as a maid vacuuming outside Tambor's room. Two guys are guarding the door. While Nadia makes a lot of noise with the vacuum, Syd drills some holes into the wall so that they can spy on Tambor's suite. Vaughn tells Nadia that she's clear. Well, actually, he says, "Evergreen. You're clear." So, um, Nadia's code name is "Evergreen." That just…that's not even funny. Well, it's kind of funny. But only if, every time you see Nadia, you start singing, "Looooove. Soft as an easy chaaaaaair. Looooove. Fresh as the mooooorning air. OOOOOONE LOVE THAT IS SHAAAAARED BY TWOOOOO…"
Seriously. No more coffee.
As some spytastic piano music plays, Syd and gang set up the cameras and audio. Inside Tambor's room, the man himself has shown up, and he takes a set at his laptop while the Appleseed Gang watch. Nadia knocks on a door. "Housekeeping!" Down the hall, a well-dressed woman exits the elevator, followed closely by a porter who's loaded down with about ninety bags of swag. This will be important in a couple of minutes, don't you worry. The door to the Appleseed suite opens up and Weiss is there. "Oh, I'm sorry, I ordered a French maid." Heh. Nadia just grins at him and enters the room.
Syd, watching the monitors, says that Tambor's laptop is their first priority and their second is the PDA. Weiss is mystified as to why Tambor hasn't left for the casino yet. Well, as it turns out, Tambor isn't so interested in the gambling as he is in the soccer game he's just turned on. Marshall finds out who's playing and it's the Slovak Devils or something. Sloane pipes up that Tambor owns the team. Uh-oh. The Appleseed Gang is all, dammit. Now what do we do? Vaughn's all, dudes. We don't get in there tonight, we lose the thorine. Nadia's all, hold the phone. See that perfume on the table? I hate that shit. Smells like patchouli. The Hot Spy Sisters suddenly become Super Hot Super Spy Sisters by going all "It's Elementary, My Dear Watson" on their boyfriends. They look around Tambor's room and, judging by the perfume, slingbacks, champagne bottles, and gossip rags, they figure out Tambor has a girlfriend who has expensive tastes and likes to party rockstar style. Nadia goes off to "get what [they] need." Weiss is all, uh, what's happening? Syd fills everyone in on the girlfriend scenario and how, since Girlfriend likes to party and Tambor's just sitting around the hotel room, Girlfriend's their way in.
Sloane states that they have no intel on Girlfriend, so they'll be going in blind. He obviously doesn't like the idea. Jack asks how Syd proposes to find Girlfriend. Syd's all, her purse is still there, so I'd wager that she's downstairs getting good and liquored up at the hotel bar. All Syd and Nadia need to do is get to Girlfriend and get her to take them to her room. Vaughn smiles at her and Syd's all, whuh? Why're you smiling? Vaughn's all, heeyuk-yuk, I dunno. My girlfriend's all smart and shit, that's all. Heeyuk-yuk. Nadia enters, her arms loaded down with the bags from the well-dressed woman we just saw not a minute before. Weiss is all, where'd you get this stuff? Nadia's all, I borrowed it. Weiss is all, you stole it, didn't you! My girl stole stuff! I dig her the most, heeyuk-yuk. Both Weiss and Vaughn are all googly-eyed over their girlfriends and it really is the funniest and cutest part of this whole damn episode.