Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Dream Is A Fitz Your Heart Makes
By Jacob Clifton | Season 2 | Episode 16 | Aired on 01.16.2012
Spencer: "Anyway. I brought over some Chinese takeout and this logbook from the Blind People Palace in the hopes that one of these days you assholes would pay attention to the clues that this show is about instead of going off on these constant wild good chases and wild goose dates with furries and old women."
Liars: "You've earned it. Show us what you've got."
Fact: Jenna told us that Alison blackmailed her to stay out of Rosewood during the 48 hours she was getting murdered.
Fact: Alison never signed in during that time to tell her that.
Conclusion: Alison is A, murdered herself by bludgeoning, and signs things in invisible ink.
Fact: Who did sign in, though, is Garrett Reynolds, who was there for twenty minutes before signing Jenna out for the night.
Fact: Neither Jenna nor Garrett's whereabouts, then, can be determined during the 48 hours it took for literally everybody on this show to either make out with or murder Alison DiLaurentis one by one.
Conclusion: Jenna and Garrett are A, murdered Alison through choking, and have a secret lair inside the lake house attic.
Hanna: "Can we just look at this later? I'm hungry and crabby."
Aria: "Sure, just let me pass you these dumplings!"
Chinese Food: "Worms. You're eating worms, Michael."
Liars: Freak out and throw the worms all over the place, screaming.
A: "Hope you like worms, bitches! This is what happens when you use yourself as live bait, Emily!"
A-TAG
Because the only working contractor in Rosewood Pennsylvania is an unemancipated minor by the name Toby Cavanaugh, clearly any sabotage being done to construction equipment is an attempt on his life.
NEXT WEEK
Toby falls off a thing, we get to see video of -- I am not shitting you -- yet another person murdering Alison on the night she was murdered, Caleb probably tries to help get Lucas back in Hanna's good graces while unknowingly exposing himself as a threat to A, Mona develops an unnerving attachment to Spencer, Jenna finally comes back to town having had cybernetic eyeballs installed in her face that can see into your soul, Ashley drinks some more wine and starts up a relationship with Noel Kahn, Maya starts a high-end catering business to support her secret children, and Aria enters yet another hand-holding relationship that can only end in tears.