Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT A Dream Is A Fitz Your Heart Makes
By Jacob Clifton | Season 2 | Episode 16 | Aired on 01.16.2012
Mona, verbatim/awesome: "Have you ever seen me in a sweater set? No! Because I don't wear sweater sets. Or blends. I think he broke me."
Spencer, same: "I don't that you didn't ask me, but I think that you can raise the bar a little bit. I know that there are plenty of guys..."
Mona: "Do you know how hard I have to work to get a guy like Noel Kahn to go out with me?"
Jacob: "Clearly not hard enough, babe."
Spencer: "Well, if you've become the Mona you want to be, why are you letting Noel Kahn tell you that you're not good enough?
Jacob: "Um, Noel Kahn is the kind of guy wars are fought over."
Spencer: "You cannot let him send you spinning backwards like that."
Jacob: "You're a much better person than I am."
Mona: "You're, like, smart smart. I always thought you were just book smart. You want a sweater set? Cashmere blend?"
Oh my God. Not only was that entirely too sweet, and characteristic of Spencer -- and very much of a piece with the Mona we're finally coming to understand -- but also what a great little scene, period! Spencer, I take it back. You are the least crazy this week than you've been since the clock tower. Well done.
POST-PLAY FREAKSHOW
Teacher Lady: "I'm a dumb old broad who thinks children are stupid. Who knew teenagers could enjoy plays or anything not on the YouTubes [sic] or Website Pages?"
Aria: "I'm a pretentious twit who nonetheless has thousands of valid reasons to distrust anyone over the age of like 17."
Holden: "I'm still an unknown element but I can tell you that teens are fairly conscious of the world around them, whatever self-aggrandizing Baby Boomer bullshit you tell yourself."
Aria: "With the exception of me, of course. I'm too busy staring a hole in time and space looking for my elderly boyfriend."
Teacher Lady: "Oh, he's not here. You made him physically ill and he left ten minutes in. Shaking with pedophile desire, but gone nevertheless."
Aria: "I defy you, stars! Surely fate cannot be so cruel!"
Fate: "You absolutely have got to pull your shit together, Aria Montgomery."
MARIN MASSACRE PART I
Ashley: "Hanna, I'm just going to take a bath with these bottles of wine. Try not to get murdered while I'm strangely out of earshot, once again, in my own gorgeous home."
Hanna: "Cool, I'm going to keep calling Caleb over and over to dissuade him from trying to figure out what's wrong with his best friend."
Somebody: Immediately breaks into the house.
Hanna: Shuts the door, wind howling, and forgets to think about how she is about to get murdered.