Episode Report Card Erin: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT If it ain't broke, Spy Daddy will BLOW IT UP.
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.19.2002
"Whatever Arvin Sloane pays you," he smirks, "it can't be enough. Would you consider coming to work for me if it meant I'd let you walk out of here?" Hell YEAH. Does that also mean we'll be swapping spit later? Because I'd do that too. Syd looks at Sark incredulously. "I believe if you took the time to hear a comprehensive offer," he continues, "you might actually say yes." Syd just looks at him. "You're cute, but I'll pass," she smirks. And then she pulls out the key, setting off the alarm.
No, Viggo. I don't think David Anders is cuter than you. Well, yes, we were lovers. Hot, steamy, buck-nekkid lovers. But that's not important right now. What's important is that I'd like you to go in the other room and put on that outfit you wore in G.I. Jane. I feel like a little trip to Viggo's Boot Camp Of Booty tonight.
Syd starts kicking the shit out of Sark, but he's a feisty one and he fights back. He knocks Syd out with a roundhouse kick, makes his way over to the book, opens it, and finds the map. Russian soldiers can be heard running toward the library, so Sark drops the book (along with the map -- butterfingers!) and dives behind a desk with his gun. Syd's not knocked out, as we thought, and she's watching as Sark starts shooting the hell out of the guards. Amidst the gunplay, Sark neglects to keep an eye on the map, and Syd comes out of hiding, nabs it, and runs up the stairs as Sark gets his ass captured by Russian soldiers. For an all-important "Bible"-pinpointing map, Sark's awfully careless with it.
Syd makes haste down the halls with the soldiers close behind. She ducks into an office, whips off her gaudy gold belt buckle, and lo and behold, it's a phone! She calls her non-boyfriend and hisses that she's trapped in the technical services building and needs a way out. NOW. "My mother said something about secret passages," she spits. "GET HER ON THE PHONE!"
Mama Hari's deep in warrior pose when Vaughn races up to the window and fills her in on the situation at hand. "Where is she, exactly?" asks Mama Hari calmly. Vaughn relays the question. "In an office on the seventh floor," whispers Syd. Vaughn. Relaying. Some more. The soldiers are closing in. "Whose office?" asks Mama Hari. Vaughn. Relaying. Again. "General Vitaly Seminov," says Syd. Vaughn. Relaying. "Ask her if there's an abstract painting behind the desk," says Mama Hari. He does. Syd affirms. The soldiers are thisclose. Vaughn tells Syd that behind the painting is an activation switch for a security door. As the soldiers make their way through the outer office, Syd presses the switch, a cabinet swings away from the wall, and she makes her getaway. The soldiers enter to an empty office and a painting slightly askew.