Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Till The Suck Runs Out
By Jacob Clifton | Season 1 | Episode 11 | Aired on 07.08.1999
Depot main square. John's got his goggles on his forehead and looks totally cute; Aeryn's got hers on already and looks totally cute. Later on she'll let them hang down from her neck, and they will look totally cute there, too. They laugh about how silly they look in the goggles and then head out into the square. "Furlow better be good. I gotta get back up there." Aeryn -- studied, disinterested -- decides just then to call Moya. "Pilot, can you read us?" People stare and point at them in the square. "Zhaan? D'Argo?" John grunts that ADD'Argo's just going to have to wait. "Yeah. Well, we're gonna have to tell them something -- like we're gonna be stuck on this dump for longer than we anticipated." John asks Aeryn what the hell her problem is. "You should be dancing in the streets, you know. If I figure out how to make a wormhole, I am outta here. I'm outta your hair once and for all..." One little beat. One tiny beat, less than a second long. "...Unless you wanna come with me? You know that offer's still open, if you wanna think about it." She declares that she doesn't want to think about it. "Talk about it?" No!
Before you can say "unspoken sexual tension and everything that's going on with Aeryn right now and also at all times," three Craises appear in hologram in the middle of the square. That's three times the stupid ponytail! "Attention! There are fugitives among you, fugitives that can be worth a great deal to anyone of you." Aeryn identifies this for Crichton as a wanted beacon. "I am Captain Bialar Crais, and I am offering a substantial reward to anyone who can assist us in the recapture of three escaped prisoners." John notes that he said three, which means he's leaving out Aeryn and John both. "...These three fugitives from Peacekeeper custody have violated their parole." John knows that Crais wants to kill him himself, but can't figure out why he's not asking for Aeryn's head as well. "Oh, I think I might have an answer." A horrible one. Aeryn reaches in and removes the beacon. The stupid ponytail disappears; something even stupider approaches.
There shouldn't be a planet of lawyers. That's lame. And it shouldn't be called Litigara, for fuck's sake. The time for people with their faces half-white and half-black and everybody learns a little something was in the neighborhood of one hundred years ago. In the same way, if you're going to investigate the alpha-dog boy issues that have been floating around D'Argo and John -- and Aeryn -- since the show started, why you gotta have actual goddamn dog people? If you're gonna have bloodhound tracker mercs, why actual goddamn bloodhounds? That being said, the dog people are pretty cool-looking, I don't mind their performances at all, and this episode cuts through a lot of the layered bullshit. Entirely too cavalier and "show, don't tell" by half, but I like the instinct, I guess.