Episode Report Card M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Not-So-Secret Service
By M. Giant | Season 5 | Episode 25 | Aired on 09.13.2006
POTUS is indeed doing a press conference. In the back, the Deputy asks Pete how reliable Xavier really is, and Pete says he built three counterfeiting cases on Xavier's info, against mid-level members of the "Barranquilla Cartel." The director's assistant hands over a folder with the Q clearance list, which looks to be about thirty or forty names. He wants all of them to take a lie detector test, and says they need to assign a team to find the traitor. The Deputy says Kiefer's the best investigator they have. The Director asks what Pete thinks, and Pete says, "He'll follow the evidence, wherever it leads him." The scene ends before President Hammer notices the whispering in the back and asks the Secret Service officers, "Gentlemen, was there something you wanted to share with the rest of the class?"
Later, the Deputy is in Kiefer's office, giving him the assignment and saying he can pick any partner he wants. So Kiefer says he's going to keep Jill. Off the Deputy's surprised look, Kiefer explains, "She hasn't been ruined by years in the field." He doesn't add that standing next to her makes him look tall. The Deputy looks uncertain, but goes along with him. After all, his name's Paul, and it's between y'all.
Threat montage, and then we're back in the Oval Office with POTUS, FLOTUS, the National Security Advisor, the three highest-ranking Secret Service members, and Pete. Basically, everyone agrees that this seems to be a credible threat. The Director says they're cycling out White House agents, Montrose says they'll all be keeping an eye on each other. FLOTUS gets up from where she's sitting, walks around in front of her husband, and sits on the other side of him, for no other reason than that, now, she's not facing Pete any more. Subtle. Not that anyone notices or comments. POTUS tells them to do what they need to do, but he wants the threat and the investigation kept classified. Must be an election year.
Outside, on the portico, the Director asks Montrose if there's anything he can think of to help him protect the President better. "Yeah," says Montrose, pulling out a quarter. "This." What's he going to do, try to bribe would-be gunmen? Rely on pay phones to call for backup? Practice first-person shooters at the arcade? Tape it to POTUS's chest to stop bullets?
Oh, now I get it. The President is just finishing up some speech at some auditorium. In the wings, Montrose flips his quarter and says to the agent at his elbow, "Heads it's Sixth Street, tails it's Eighth." A splitscreen shows two separate motorcades standing ready to schlep POTUS back to the White House. The coin selects Bravo route, and the President and his entourage cut through the kitchen while an agent makes sure all the chefs have their knives put down. One assumes these little scenes would be even more awkward if the President were deathly allergic to nuts.
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