Episode Report Card Demian: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Gypsies, Tramps, and Feebs
By Demian | Season 5 | Episode 6 | Aired on 10.19.2002
Out in the hallway, the three confront the tight-lipped Feebs. Eventually, she allows as how she hasn't received a premonition in several months. Even worse, she can no longer levitate. To demonstrate this, Phoebe moves to the center of the hallway and thinks real hard for a moment, only to rise a mere inch from the floor. The Dolt berates her for keeping these developments to herself. He's her Whitelighter, after all. She should be telling him about these things. "You've been busy," Phoebe meekly protests. "I've? Been busy?" the Dolt burbles incredulously. This episode is just one shout-out after another, isn't it? Phoebe natters something about her professional responsibilities before the Dolt cuts her off with a terse instruction to Piper and Raige: "You guys yell at her. I'm gonna check with the Elders and see what they know." Bwa! Ha! The Dolt made a funny. I suppose they'll be wanting overcoats down in Hell now. After the Dolt orbs out, Piper tosses her head around, wailing that Phoebe should have confided in her sisters before assaulting some random Gypsy woman with her problems. Phoebe dismisses this criticism to focus on the more urgent matter of her intercepted premonition. She believes something desperate and demonic befell Madame T the previous evening, but she hasn't had a chance to return to the storefront. Raige immediately volunteers for Gypsy duty. Phoebe thanks her, hands her Tereza's business card, and disappears through the front door as her cell phone chirps yet again.
Lair Of The Mormons. Sonny Hatch plucks Tereza's eyeballs from a small box and places them on a tray. Delicate clumps of moist tissue cling to each eye. It's vile. "I have a good feeling about these," Sonny growls. Such a loving weasel. The Reprehensible Senator From Utah's pasty, whiskered, weak-chinned face is partially obscured by a pair of dark glasses. "I was glad to see the Shuvani didn't put up much of a fight," he notes. Sonny's surprised that Dear Old Dad could "see" that far: "Your mind's eye grows stronger." The Reprehensible Senator snorts that his goddamned mind's eye better be stronger. After all, he's "had a long time to develop it." A mouse chooses this moment to scamper across the table. Without hesitation, The Reprehensible Senator raises a hand and fries the hapless rodent with a flaring bolt of demonic mojo. Sonny Hatch smirks in admiration, then grows serious as he presents The Reprehensible Senator with the purloined eyeballs. The Reprehensible Senator slides the dark glasses from his face and opens his eyelids, and we drop into a vast, sucking vortex of cheap CGI. They've simply blacked out the actor's eyes. That's it. No sunken sockets, no purplish bruising, no sick-making ooze. Nothing. Nada. Zip. And things were going so well. The Reprehensible Senator pops Tereza's eyes into his own skull and grins. His malicious glee is short-lived, however, as the eyes almost immediately combust in his head. The Reprehensible Senator howls and moans and pounds his fists against the table for a bit before quieting down. Sonny averts his gaze and softly suggests they stop it with the eye-snatching already. "No!" The Reprehensible Senator From Utah grunts. "The eyes I seek are worth this pain." He senses Tereza's "Shuvani friend" roaming around nearby, and sends Sonny Boy after her.