Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 63 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT What Was in the Box
By Jacob Clifton | Season 5 | Episode 12 | Aired on 01.12.2014
HON GARBER
The Judge commands the juries to only listen to evidence about their defendant, and also not to consult with the other jury, and half of them are in folding chairs and the other half is in the box, and they whine about that, and Garber is like, "Stop being annoying about the annoying thing I did to you out of pure annoying whimsy!" and that continues throughout the entire episode.
Officer Sorrento: "We were watching them from Customs on, because they look weird together."
Geneva: "Weird like they were trafficking drugs? Or weird like a nine and a four shouldn't even be seen talking to each other?"
Sorrento: "Mostly the latter but then maybe the former, because it was Rio from which they were coming. He was sweating, and she was staring at her feet. Classic drug-trafficking signs, if you've ever seen Brokedown Palace for example."
Diane: "Officer, did you know they fell in love that week, in Rio? Maybe that was why they were so nervous."
Sorrento: "Maybe? But also, they might've been nervous because of the solid hundred-grand of coke in his carry-on."
Diane: "Thanks for the segue, because I wanted to know why you arrested the lady one?"
Sorrento: "She had thirty grand on her."
Diane: "Circumstantial evidence of conspiracy, leading to an investigation which still yielded no direct evidence that the lady one was part of this man's scheme..."
FA: "Uh, not in front of my jury you don't."
Diane: "My bad. What I meant to say was, you can't prove she had access to his bag, where the coke was."
Alicia: "My client was carrying the bags, so you just assumed it was his with the coke?"
Sorrento: "Footage from the Rio airport confirmed it was in his sole possession..."
Alicia: "Did you know she already had two carry-ons? Because it didn't have a nametag. So doesn't it seem like maybe he was the mark in her scheme?"
Diane: "Same objection but the other way!"
The four of them go down the rabbit hole of screaming and then the jury gets into it and then there is a riot. Just kidding, it is merely annoying. The rare case -- especially this season -- of a story being less than the sum of its parts, which in this case hearken back to the silliness of, say, the time they slammed windows and honked horns every time anybody said a swear. We get it, this was a dumb idea. Which begs the question.