Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 63 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT What Was in the Box
By Jacob Clifton | Season 5 | Episode 12 | Aired on 01.12.2014
HON GARBER
Juries: "[Bitching.]"
Abel Botera: "I am the doorman at the resort they met at. I am in this video of the happy couple chilling in the lobby of the hotel with Alonso Cazorla, the famous Brazilian druglord."
Cary: "We are all so much more than one thing. Like did you know Mr. Cazorla also runs a scuba diving company for tourists, and a nightclub, and two gas stations?"
Botera: "Yeah, they're drug fronts. It's not that hard to understand."
Cary: "Sure, sure. But why would these people know that? This video looks like them paying for scuba lessons. Which I'm pretty sure you concierged for her the day before that."
Botera: "I guess so?"
Cary: "Point being, those lessons were for the Lady alone. And therefore the only meeting prior to this video would have been just her and Cazorla..."
Will: "Objection! Because when you say it like that it sounds like she was shady!"
Cary: "No comment."
Diane: "Judge Garber, make them stop making our lady look bad!"
Judge: "This is a damn hassle!"
Everybody: "Says the guy who dropped this deuce on us in the first place."
Diane: "Can we not work together on this?"
Alicia: "Yeah, tell your asshole partner that."
Diane: "Done. Will, go see Mr. Paisley about this corporate espionage Kalinda thinks she did. I will be a lawyer here, in court."
PAISLEY
Will and Kalinda head over to the head of the Paisley Group -- Tom Skerritt, meaning we are not done with this company -- to see about getting him back in the fold.
Paisley: "Actually I already dropped the idea of leaving for F/A, so..."
Will: "Are you sure? Because what about your whore granddaughter?"
Paisley: "Uh, my granddaughter Haley has Hodgkin's. She's in a wheelchair."
Will: "So, not soliciting sex for cash?"
Paisley: "Uh, no? Prepare for incoming, though."
Will: "What the fuck just happened?"
Kalinda: "What just happened is, I just got Kalinda'd. By Cary Agos of all people."
Will: "That's kinda hot."
Kalinda: "You said it, sister."
COURT
Cary: "Glad to hear from you, Mr. Paisley! I agree, they do not have the personal touch over at Lockhart/Gardner where they would know your granddaughter is no hollaback girl. See you soon."