Episode Report Card Gustave: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Hello, Chesty. Goodbye, Chesty.
By Gustave | Season 2 | Episode 23 | Aired on 05.12.2003
A Beautiful Roof. Things are getting a little blurry for Hightops. Kiefer tries to assure him that everything's going to be all right. The chopper can be heard in the distance. Kiefer begs him to hang in there as he gets up to signal the chopper.
Meanwhile, at CTU, HallMonitorCarrie tells a fully conscious Chappelle about the chopper that's picking up Kiefer. "Shall I have them detain Kiefer?" asks HallMonitorCarrie. Chappelle tells her not to arrest Kiefer. "I don't want to waste anymore resources on him," says Chappelle. "Just get the chopper back here." HallMonitorCarrie orders the chopper to come back to CTU without landing on A Beautiful Roof. Back up on A Beautiful Roof, the chopper turns around and leaves Kiefer stranded on top of the building and trying to summon them back with the Sutherland Velvet. Unfortunately, the sound of the rotary blades drowns out Kiefer's velvety plea, and the chopper disappears. Kiefer calls Bitchelle and asks why they didn't get picked up. Bitchelle explains that Brad locked them down. "I don't care," says Kiefer. "Hightops is dying!" He runs back to check on Hightops, and he's dead. The time is 06:23:46 AM.
The time is 06:28:12 AM. Klockwise from the top left, Bitchelle gets settled in her new temporary work station, Palmer sits around in that detention room some more, and Brad and Chappelle decide what to do about Soul Patch. Back at A Beautiful Roof, Kiefer calls Bitchelle, who is sitting in this trailer that looks like a really sleek meth lab, and tells her to get ready to "interface" with Hightops's computer. "What about Hightops?" asks Bitchelle. "He's dead," mentions Kiefer kasually. Bitchelle expresses her condolences…or whatever it is you express when some guy dies who's about to stop a war.
District. Palmer's Detention Room. PoorMan'sHumeCronyn enters, and sits down with Palmer to discuss a "matter of national security" with him. "As I'm not the commander in chief anymore," says Palmer, "I don't see how that would be relevant." PMHC continues regardless, telling Palmer that they've got a problem with the Turkish government. Apparently, the stealth bombers headed toward the Middle East are approaching Turkish airspace, and the Prime Minister of Turkey refuses to give "flyover" permission unless he can speak with the President personally. "The Prime Minister hasn't been told that I've been removed from office," says Palmer, slowly catching on to the fact that PMHC is about to ask him to call the Turkish Prime Minister and pretend to still be the President. PMHC explains that they can't tell the Turkish government about Palmer's removal before they inform the American people. "No, that wouldn't be right now, would it?" says Palmer mockingly. PMHC explains that the planes could be attacked if they got into it with the Turkish Air Force. "This phone call, no matter how distasteful it may be for you, sir, could prevent those planes from being attacked," says PMHC. And yet again 24 is the victim of its own prescience. They dreamt up a war with the Middle East that happens to be broadcast right after our own real war with the Middle East ended, where, like, Iraq didn't even fight back, let alone "attack stealth bombers" successfully. Like, that war was such a joke, the media had to fake the seizure of Jessica Lynch to make it look like we actually had a formidable opponent. The planes could skywrite "Turkey Sucks" over Istanbul and no one would give a shit. We could have -- I don't know -- Carrot Top make the phone call and we'd have permission in a microsecond. But back in the 24-verse, gajillions of lives will be lost if Palmer and only Palmer doesn't get on the horn with Turkey and sweet-talk that Prime Minister into letting the U.S. have a flyover. Palmer just sits there staring at PMHC's imploring face. That damn scar on his face right under his eye just totally makes him look like the crying Indian Chief in that litter PSA.