Episode Report Card Gustave: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I musta killed Spawn!
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 19 | Aired on 04.08.2002
The screen splits and we return to a special Lifetime Channel presentation of Todd Can't Find Me: The Teri Bouvier Sutherland Bauer Story. Based on a true story, it's all about the journey of a courageous woman who finds the courage to battle a fibroid tumor when Eastern Bloc terrorists kidnap her special-needs child and cause her to develop amnesia. Bride sits in Spawn's room and caresses all the fluffy pink things her stupid daughter has lying around. Even her pearly PC laptop has a pink bow on it. Dr. Phil stands in the doorway and watches her. Bride complains that she can't remember anything about her daughter, despite being in her room. "Sometimes music can unlock memories," says Dr. Phil, crossing the room to turn on Spawn's mauve boom box. Okay, did he really say that? Ew! Dr. Phil pushes play on Spawn's tape deck, and the same song comes on that was playing when Bride and Kiefer discovered that Spawn was missing. Bride caresses a phallic stuffed animal and asks Dr. Phil some more questions about their relationship. We learn that Spawn never met Dr. Phil because Bride kept him a secret. Dr. Phil tells Bride that she made Kiefer move out because she lost her connection with him, but took him back because she didn't want to lose her family. "I don't remember you at all," says Bride. "But being with you makes me feel good and maybe I don't feel so scared." Ooh Bride! You so nasty, you belong in Versailles in 1797. They hold hands. But Bride thanks him for his being there a little too crisply.
The Bad Drug Deal. Dan'sWeaselFacedBrother paces around with a cigarette artfully dangling out of mouth, ashing on the sage green viscose that his short-sleeved sport shirt is made of, making frantic calls to people with names like "Chuck" and asking them for sinister drugster-y things. Spawn wants to make a run for it but Rick warns against it, telling her about DWFB being "psycho" and therefore not the sort of person you want to "run away from." Oh, I had always thought that psychos were a good thing to "run away from" in general, but Rick's the expert here so I'll leave it up to him. I guess it's like what they tell you about bees. Spawn -- who is actually trying to go somewhere without Rick -- tiptoes to the front door while DWFB's back is turned. Uh oh. Someone's at the door. Look what central casting just sent over: dangerous-looking hoodlum-type extras who will just come over and make things look like they're really going to get bad. But don't worry. They brought their own guns. Wait, guns? I thought these were ecstasy dealers! So did Rick. DWFB explains that these aren't dealers; these are buddies of his who are going to help hold up the ecstasy dealer when he comes over. Is this house built on an Indian burial ground? Oh, and I just thought I'd point out another visual detail that indicates just how dangerous the Frat Boy lifestyle is. Their fridge is really really dirty. DWFB checks out all the guns his buddy's just brought over and mock-shoots Rick, then Spawn. The time is 6:23:22 PM.