Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: B+ | 4 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT Dear Feelings Journal...
By Cindy McLennan | Season 1 | Episode 1 | Aired on 09.10.2009
g them both off the balcony toward the ground below. Only Stefan hits bottom, though. Damon's got some Gypsy parlor tricks up his sleeve and is fast enough -- strong enough, to escape the fall. Stefan pleads for Damon to give their rivalry a rest, but Damon reminds Stefan that he promised to give him "an eternity of misery." As Stefan warns Damon to stay away from Elena, Damon interrupts to point out that Stefan's magical ring has gone missing. "Oh yeah, the sun's coming up in a couple of hours and *poof* -- ashes to ashes." Oh, so it's the gem of Amara. Thank goodness it's not the sunglasses. Before Stefan can respond, Damon tells him to relax, produces the ring, and holds it out to his brother. As Stefan slips it back on his finger, Damon goes all vein-y and bloodshot, grabs Stefan by the throat and tosses him across the yard. He bounces off the garage and falls back at Damon's feet with a thud. Damon loses his whimsy. "You should know better than to think you're stronger than me. You lost that fight when you stopped feeding on people. I wouldn't try it again." Stefan searches for words but they refuse to come. Damon looks around and grins. "I think we woke Zach up." He turns from Stefan and approaches the house. "Hi Zach."Party: Jeremy is pounding a beer, despite the umpteen cops on the scene. Where is this magical place where teenagers get Christmas-light lit venues for their keg parties, and indulgent cops who care nothing about them breaking the law? Elena points out his folly and tells him that the town is pretty much over their sympathy for the Gilbert orphans, so Jeremy chucks the bottle over his shoulder. As they wait for Aunt Jenna, Elena continues, saying, "The rest of the world has moved on. You should try too." Jeremy doesn't think Elena's habit of writing in her diary in the cemetery is a sure sign of her moving on. Elena frowns. "Mom and dad wouldn't have wanted this." And we cut to...
The Grill: Bonnie encourages Caroline to chug her coffee and sober up, but Caroline's wallowing in the fact that she's just not Elena, no matter how hard she tries. Of course the problem is that she tries too hard, which scares off friends and beaux alike -- all of whom naturally flock to Elena. When Bonnie reminds Caroline that it's not a competition, Caroline waits a beat, and then says, "Yeah. It is."
Hospital: Matt keeps vigil over his sister Vicki's bedside, because nobody in this town has parents, apparently. She stirs and wakes, but when she tries to speak, Matt tells her not to try and assures her she's okay. Vicki won't be silenced. Voice hoarse, she rasps, "Vampire!" Matt's blue eyes grow to twice their size. COMMERCIAL!
Dueling DIARY-Ahhh Montage! Elena sits at her window seat, bemoaning the fact that she can't smile her way through things. Meanwhile, at Mossy Manse, Stefan rues the wrench that's been thrown into his plan to forget the past and start a life with someone new. Their words overlap and we go from cheese to Kraft Macaroni And... Jenna looks in on Jeremy, who is staring at a picture of his parents, and Elena and Stefan continue their litany, but I can't listen anymore. At The Grill, Bonnie leaves Caroline at their booth, and who should be looking over at her but Damon. OH MY WORD. What's wrong with Ian Somerhalder in this shot? I think it's the hair and the awkward angle, but Scott says he looks like he's had some (bad) work done. Either way? Do not ruin the pretty, people! Caroline turns on the charm and smiles at him. Damon cocks his head and smiles back in a way that makes him look more like a pedophile than anyone you'll see on your local police department's list. Back at the Gilbert's, Elena's still blathering to her diary about being ready for the good, so that when it comes, you can "invite it in." Ouch. There's more, but I'll spare you. The important thing is, just as she looks out her window, Stefan materializes. She rushes to her front door to meet him. He knows it's late, but he just needs to know if she's okay. Elena sighs that that's all anyone ever wants to know about her -- if she'll be okay. Stefan says, "What do you tell them?" Looking down, Elena says she tells them she'll be fine. When Stefan asks if she ever means it, Elena says, "Ask me tomorrow." She holds his gaze. "It's warmer in the house. We can talk. Backing up a few steps, Elena asks, "Would you like to come in?" Now that's the kind of invite Stefan needs. He smiles and nods. "Yes." He enters, and Elena shuts the door behind him. Don't worry. After all these years, I'm sure Willow has put the de-invite spell up on the web. She's a geek like that.
So, what did you think? I read some rough reviews of this so I was truly and pleasantly surprised by the episode. With some notable exceptions (McQueen, Ellwell, Somerhalder) the cast has yet to sink their teeth deep down in their roles, but that's generally the case at the beginning of a new drama. The story is pure cheese, but so, to my mind, that's the level upon which it should be judged. No comparing it to lobster, you know? The fog and the crow? This is a gothic (teen) romance. They have their place here, even though I'm slightly confused by the fact that Damon seems to have these powers, rather than Stefan. The narration -- well, I know some of you hate any and all of it, but in theory, it's okay with me. Look, in addition to this show and Lost, I also cover How I Met Your Mother, which uses narration regularly, but like Pushing Daisies and the Veronica Mars voice-overs before it, HIMYM's narration is never too heavy. There was too much in The Vampire Diaries, tonight. I'm giving the writers a pass, because that's the premise, but it's not an unlimited pass. They should watch the "Passion" episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, if they want to know how to do it right. And when all else fails, less is more. In sum, I'm looking forward to episode two, because I think all the ingredients are here. They just need time to macerate. Everyone's pretty, and none of the cast members seem like they'd be stuck in a paper bag if acting were their only way out. The dialogue had some high points and I want to know what happens next. All in all, I've been sucked in. I'll see you next week. 'Til then, my fingers are crossed, so make room for the cheese slices.