Episode Report Card Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Suck Like An Egyptian
By Miss Alli | Season 5 | Episode 5 | Aired on 08.02.2004
11:50 AM. Brandon and Nicole. So they're leaving more than two hours after Colin and Christie, and more than an hour and a half after Mirna and Charla. As they leave, Brandon goes on a bit about how awesome "Nikki" is, and what a great girlfriend she is, and so forth. He speculates to her that the train station might be within walking distance. "No, I want to get a cab," she says flatly. "Okay," he answers. Heh. Never argue with a woman who just swallowed thousands of fish eggs for you. I think that's in the Bible, actually. After an adorable shot of a guy pulling a kid on a sled, Brandon and Nicole get a cab, and Brandon says to the driver -- wait for it -- "Choo-chooooo!" In the cab, Brandon sheepishly (and I'm not just talking about his hair) allows that "this would have been a long walk." Heh. Nicole's like, "Duh," but refrains from saying, "Didn't get that memo from God about walking this time, huh, 'baby'?" Which is what I would have done.
Charla and Mirna are wandering aimlessly, as they do. They apparently are unable even to establish contact with a taxi, a task that seems to have presented absolutely no problems for anyone else. They throw in a little "choo-choo!" at a guy standing along the road.
At the train station, Colin and Christie get tickets and get on the second train to St. Petersburg. Meanwhile, the first train is bringing Chip and Kim into St. Petersburg. They get off the train in town.
12:14 PM. Linda and Karen. They get a cab.
12:50 PM. Twinkies. They talk about how the Bowling Moms are ahead of them, and how the Twinkies "want to beat them." I'm glad they're getting the hang of it. It's only taken four legs. We also see the Moms in a cab talking about being in a "horse race" with the Twinkies, but of course, they left the pit stop a half-hour ahead of them, so it's hard to call that a squeaker, at least this early on. I'm having a little trouble getting into the whole "Twinkies versus Moms!" tension thing they're trying to set up here, because...I can't stand the twins, and I'm bored by the moms for the most part.
Charla stops a guy on the street with a rendition of that hit that's making its way up the pop charts -- it goes a little something like this: "Choo-choooo!" He doesn't appear very responsive, as Mirna whines that they can't find a taxi and can't find the train station. She voices over that their hair froze while they were walking. Oh, please, big deal. That happens to me multiple times every winter. The best reason to blow dry your hair in Minnesota in January? So it doesn't get broken. They wind up walking the entire way to the train station, and when they get there, what do they have to say? "Choo-choooo!" Yeah, you're already there, so you can quit that now, because you're really going to be sad if they put you on a steam engine. You know what's admirable, though? The show didn't explicitly comment on everybody saying "choo-choo." They just showed it, and they trusted you to get it. On your run-of-the-mill idiot show, you'd have an interview where somebody said, "It's very difficult when you don't speak the language, so sometimes you have to improvise something that you think people will understand, and that's why we kept just saying 'choo-choo.'" Here, they just show it. They know you're going to get it, and get that it's funny. Every once in a while, I like to see a TV show that doesn't think I need embedded audio and video CliffsNotes.
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