|
12-14 2006.05.14 |
Not So Fast, Studly Cirie gets a predictable send-off at F4, as many very nice people have gotten before her. Then Chiclets grabs the F3 immunity rather unexpectedly, and she takes Aras -- who beats her. A million dollars will buy a lot of meditation. |
| 9-1 Recap |
For The Lava God, Here We Go Again
They Came At Us With Spears - The bloated new cast arrives in an idyllic South Pacific island nation, where the water is blue and the women are lucky if anybody even acknowledges that they're there. Believe it or not, the men's team fails to boot the guy who screws up the first challenge. Shocking. |
2004.09.16 2004.09.20 |
B- |
Miss Alli |
| Extra |
A Million To Whine
America's Tribal Council - Rupert was sad that he didn't win, and apparently, much of America was, too. So he should get a million dollars just because, don't you think? Oh, us, too. |
2004.05.13 2004.05.28 |
D- |
Miss Alli |
| Extra |
The Rupert Show Returns
All-Star Reunion - The aftermath of Rob and Amber's engagement, while a rather silly moment, pales in comparison to the latest "twist." Put on your boots, America, because CBS is lining up to lick them. |
2004.05.09 2004.05.24 |
C |
Miss Alli |
| 8-15 Recap |
The Triumph Of The Waif
All-Star Finale - After knocking off Rupert and Jenna, Rob and Amber proceed to the final two, where they sit through an endless string of pathetic jury speeches before the jury predictably hands the money to Amber, or as she is known to the jurors, "Not the guy who outplayed my sorry ass." |
2004.05.09 2004.05.16 |
B+ |
Miss Alli |
| 8-14 Recap |
Cinema Para-grease-o
The Instigator - Rob wins himself a truck, and when he takes Amber to a drive-in movie, it turns out that she wins a car as well. They return just in time to make sure that Big Tom and Rupert don't get up to any mischief. Indeed they do not, and Big Tom finds that Rob and Amber intend to hold to their four-person alliance with Rupert and Jenna, meaning that he is on his way to the jury. |
2004.05.06 2004.05.09 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 8-13 Recap |
Enough With The Postponing...On With The Inevitable!
A Chapera Surprise - Shii Ann continues maneuvering as cracks appear in the Chapera alliance over plantains, fishing, and who, between Rupert and Jenna, is more annoying. The loved ones show up for a gross food challenge, and Shii Ann comes surprisingly close to winning immunity for herself, but in the end it is time for the final Mogo Mogo to go. |
2004.04.29 2004.05.05 |
B- |
Miss Alli |
| 8-12 Recap |
What Passes For Shii Ann's "Big Move"
Stupid People. Stupid, Stupid People - Shii Ann manages to pull down immunity for once, and she completely squanders the opportunity by being an even bigger obnoxious brat than she's been up to this point. Good one, genius. |
2004.04.22 2004.04.28 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 8-11 Recap |
A Thoughtful Gesture Or A Deceptive Plan?
A Thoughtful Gesture Or A Deceptive Plan? - Rob gives up his reward to appease the tribe, and Kathy goes home. |
2004.04.15 2004.04.21 |
B |
Kim |
| 8-10 Recap |
It's Not "Show Friends," It's "Show Business"
Anger, Tears, And Chaos - The merge comes at last, and Lex is all excited about the fact that he has this big marker from Rob on which he can collect. Of course, Rob had his fingers crossed, and the no-brainer that is Lex's ouster quickly follows. Oh, Lex. You big dummy. |
2004.04.08 2004.04.11 |
B+ |
Miss Alli |
| 8-9 Recap |
The Shuffle That Didn't
Mad Scramble And Broken Hearts - Theoretically, there's a complete reshuffling of the tribes. In practice, Amber is moved to Mogo Mogo and the tribes trade camps. Rob is sad, and manages to convince Lex to keep Amber and get rid of Jerri. The better to Pagong you with, my dear. |
2004.04.01 2004.04.06 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| Extra |
Everything Old Is New Again
A Closer Look - If by "new," you mean "still old, but being replayed as filler." There are about three segments that are interesting that we haven't already seen, but for the most part, this is trademark Burnett time-wasting, and if you never see it, you'll never miss it. |
2004.03.25 2004.03.30 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 8-8 Recap |
Fishing For Compliments
Pick A Tribemate - A reward challenge allows Chapera to swipe the fishing spear, setting up a showdown between Rupert and Rob. Later, an immunity-challenge loss sends Mogo Mogo to tribal council, where Lex assures Ethan that it's just business as he has him dispatched. |
2004.03.17 2004.03.23 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 8-7 Recap |
The Champagne And The Challenge Spaz
Sorry...I Blew It - A combined immunity/reward challenge goes poorly for Mogo Mogo after Ethan breaks the equipment and loses his knot-tying ability at a key moment. Chapera takes Kathy along for a day of rest and booze, while power shifts at Mogo Mogo lead to the departure of Colby. Goodbye, shiny cowboy teeth. |
2004.03.11 2004.03.14 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 8-6 Recap |
What It Takes To Walk
Outraged! - After Sue spends twenty-four hours thinking about Hatch and his Adventures In Inappropriate Touching, she decides that it's time to leave, and after unloading on Probst for a bit, that's exactly what she does. It's quite possibly the least enjoyable episode of Survivor ever. |
2004.03.04 2004.03.09 |
C |
Miss Alli |
| 8-5 Recap |
The Naked And The Figuratively Dead
I've Been Bamboozled! - This week brings a raft-building challenge at which Rupert again falls flatter than a bad soufflé, and then the dismantling of the increasingly pitiful Saboga. The two remaining tribes face off at a controversy-packed immunity challenge, sending the mighty Mogo Mogo to its first tribal council. Ethan? Colby? Why, no. Wonder of wonders, they've thrown out Hatch. |
2004.02.26 2004.03.03 |
A- |
Miss Alli |
| 8-4 Recap |
The Rubbing Out of Amazon Rob
Wipe Out! - A storm stresses out the tribes, except for Chapera, which is too busy snuggling to notice. When the dust settles, Rupert is struggling to reestablish himself, and Jerri is struggling to stay sane. Chapera brings home another reward, but when they bungle the immunity challenge, it is time to say goodbye to Rob Cesternino. Back to the basement, my friend. |
2004.02.19 2004.02.22 |
B- |
Miss Alli |
| 8-3 Recap |
Jenna Jumps
Shark Attack - The teams compete in a reward challenge to rebuild their shelters to a higher standard. Rupert leads his team to tank yet again, while Chapera chalks up another good performance and takes the crown. The bootings, meanwhile, are interrupted by the heavily spoiled voluntary exit of one Jenna Morasca. |
2004.02.12 2004.02.17 |
B+ |
Miss Alli |
| 8-2 Recap |
The Removal Of Rudy
Panicked, Desperate, Thirsty As Hell - A reward challenge finally gets the teams fire, as Rudy limps and Saboga watches with concern. Chapera continues to roll, and Mogo Mogo just tries to figure out whether Hatch is ever going to put any clothes on. When Saboga boots the immunity challenge, thanks largely to Ethan, they have to go to tribal council again, where Rudy takes the fall. |
2004.02.05 2004.02.10 |
B+ |
Miss Alli |
| 8-1 Recap |
Tina Tumbles
They're Back! - The eighteen All-Stars arrive in Panama in three tribes. Don't drink the water. HEY! That means you, Sue Hawk. |
2004.02.01 2004.02.05 |
A |
Miss Alli |
| Extra |
More On Morons
Pearl Islands Reunion - The survivors sit around and flap their yaps with Jeff, although nobody really needed to show up except Rupert, Jon, and Osten. If you like those three knuckleheads, you're going to love this special. |
2003.12.14 2003.12.29 |
C |
Miss Alli |
| 7-14 Recap |
Sandra Can Get Loud, Too
Flames And Endurance - And get loud she does. Especially when they hand over the million dollars to her. Darrah falls victim to her own streak of immunities, Jon falls victim to Lill's weird sense of morality, and the rest pretty much makes sense. |
2003.12.14 2003.12.20 |
A- |
Miss Alli |
| 7-13 Recap |
The Sweet Taste Of Crow
Mutiny - Burton and Jon head off for a reward challenge together, sure that when they get back, everything will be fine. Which works great, except for the fact that when by the time they get back, the three women they left behind have formed a new alliance that proceeds to vote Burton's arrogant ass straight to Loserville. Farewell, you big creep. |
2003.12.11 2003.12.14 |
A |
Miss Alli |
| 7-12 Recap |
Sponge Bath, Flare Pants
Would You Be My Brutus Today? - Three castaways head for a spa retreat. They all practice up on their shooting, and the alliances are constantly shifting. When a plan to align the women falls short, Christa has to gather up her stupid hair and go home. It's about time. |
2003.12.04 2003.12.09 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 7-11 Recap |
Reports Of Granny Fairplay's Death Are Greatly Exaggerated
The Great Lie - Sandra says she didn't dump the fish, but she did. Jon says his granny died, but she didn't. Tijuana says she understands strategy, but she doesn't. Goodbye, Tijuana. May the elastic in your buff grow a bit more resilient. |
2003.11.27 2003.12.04 |
B+ |
Miss Alli |
| 7-10 Recap |
The Rupert Show Is Cancelled
Swimming With Sharks - Finally, we manage to rid ourselves of Rupert, who is blindsided by an alliance made up of Burton, Jon, Lill, and the women of the former Morgan tribe. This causes him to go completely insane. Watch the fireworks! |
2003.11.20 2003.11.26 |
A- |
Miss Alli |
| 7-9 Recap |
Rumblings Of Mutiny
Shocking...Simply Shocking! - Rupert's position may not be as secure as he thinks, as everyone in the tribe takes a stab at scheming against him. Well, except Tijuana and Darrah, because they're resting. A lot. In the end, though, it's time for Ryan-O to go, so he shuffles off to Juryland, taking his scraggly appearance and his increasingly sunken face with him. |
2003.11.13 2003.11.16 |
B |
Miss Alli |
| 7-8 Recap |
Andrew's Own Medicine Tastes Terrible
What the...?, Part II - Lill and Burton are coming back to Morgan and Drake respectively, just in time for the merge. Lill is the crying-on-the-inside kind of angry Scout, and there's nowhere to hide for Andrew when she teams up with Burton and the rest of Drake to take him out. |
2003.11.06 2003.11.12 |
B+ |
Miss Alli |
| 7-7 Recap |
The Pecs Take A Powder
What The...?, Part I - In this plot-heavy episode, the remaining members of Drake and Morgan are stunned at the return of those they've already booted. When both tribes are faced with voting someone out, Shawn gets the short end of a showdown between himself and Jon, while Osten ends the suspense by quitting, to the evident disgust of Jeff Probst. Good times. |
2003.10.30 2003.11.05 |
A- |
Miss Alli |
| 7-6 Recap |
On Lying Down With Snakes
Me And My Snake - Balboa's brief moment in the spotlight comes to an end, despite the best efforts of burlap-bag therapy. Drake takes the reward challenge and loads up on protein, but they stumble at the immunity challenge when Andrew puts on a show of good shoulders. Trish tries to get the super-smug Rupert out sooner rather than later, but she trusts the wrong people and her plot is revealed. Goodbye, Trish. |
2003.10.23 2003.10.29 |
B- |
Miss Alli |
| 7-5 Recap |
Smoothie Operators
Everyone's A Hero - Drake futzes two more challenges -- dropping a boat-steering contest primarily to Osten, of all people, and then dropping a disgusting-food-eating competition to Darrah. Of, you know, all people. It all leads up to the anticlimactic booting of the all-around weak Michelle. |
2003.10.16 2003.10.21 |
B- |
Miss Alli |