Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 84 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT What We Need Right Now
By Jacob Clifton | Season 5 | Episode 1 | Aired on 09.29.2013
Kalinda: "I called the provider, they said they sent you the records already, so why are you bothering me?"David Lee: "How about you just do your job?"
Kalinda: "You wanna complain, go to Will or Diane. I'm not hearing it."
David Lee: "Is this about protecting Cary?"
Kalinda turns into smoke and disappears through the cracks in the conference room wall.
David Lee: "...Or wait, are you going with them?"
The smoke forms a middle finger at him and says, "You are not very good at investigating things! She never dropped the handkerchief!" and then two middle fingers and then it is gone.
ETHICS
Peter: "I just love having my picture taken, I don't even care why. Say cheese!"
Marilyn: "Cheese!"
Eli: "Get out, I need to talk to Peter."
Marilyn: "Thank you, Governor-Elect..."
Peter: "Please, call me Peter!"
Eli: "Fuck you, Call me Peter. That girl is so fired."
Peter: "What is it with you and this woman?"
Eli: "The optics are not good. Do you hear me? You and that girl grinning like a couple of fornicators for a photo shoot. Do you realize I'm going to have to track that photographer down and drown him in a river now? I don't have time to make that an everyday thing, Peter."
Peter: "Never let it be said that I fired someone because she was too pretty. I mean, if she were too blaaaaaa..."
Eli: "I'm glad you heard yourself just now, but I'm gonna stop you there and give you a Plan B. Men like it when you give them pretend options that don't actually matter."
Peter: "It's true, I love picking between things that are the same."
Eli: "Right, so we're going to promote her. Or move her laterally..."
Peter: "That's three things I get to pick from!"
Eli: "Yep, and you can do whatever you want. But you cannot keep her. I cannot spin your sexual history any more. It is spun out."
Peter: "It's not an issue!"
Eli: "It doesn't matter if you actually want to fuck her, it matters that we have enemies. Enemies who would love to call anyone in this entire building your new bimbo."
Peter: "But she isn't!"
Eli: "I'm doing it, Peter. You choose how."
Peter: "Damn right I do."
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