Episode Report Card Erin: B- | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Tuck Everlasting
By Erin | Season 2 | Episode 2 | Aired on 10.05.2002
Rabat, Morocco. And, yeah, I had to look that up. Did YOU know where Rabat was located? I suppose I could have asked my lovely Moroccan cab driver the other night where Rabat was located, but I'd polished off three quarts of Stoli Vanilla in about thirteen minutes, so I wasn't in full control of my verbal skills. That, and I didn't KNOW Rabat was anywhere NEAR Morocco. The Techno Drums Of Impending Ass-Kicking are playing as we join Master Mohammed Naj in the lobby of the hotel. Dixon's hanging out there too, dressed in his finest "I'm Just Your Simple International Tourist Enjoying The Pleasures Of My Expense Account" white linen suit and baby blue t-shirt. Dixon communicates to Syd that he has a twenty on Naj, and Syd replies that she's coming in.
Boy, is she EVER. Dixon enters a phone booth and asks Syd if she's close. "I'm right behind you," she replies. Dixon turns and watches as Sydney sashays into the hotel looking like J. Lo after a bad weekend with Ben Affleck at Frederick's of Hollywood. Her hair, newly frosted and tendriled, is piled on her head, she's sporting an absolutely hideous pair of tinted sunglasses that I'm positive were buried with Gia Maria Carangi, and her dress of choice is a zebra-printed chemise that pushes her breasts up so far she could be wearing them as earrings. Oh, and the huge white bandage? Nowhere to be seen. I looked for it, too. I looked for the wound. I looked for ANYTHING that might not lead me to believe that the continuity team was smoking dope and playing Super Mario Sunshine on the day they shot this scene. No such luck. Syd continues to saunter in and very blatantly tucks her hair behind her ear. You know, just in case we missed this little habit of hers in the first episode of the season. Or, conversely, if we missed the same little habit showing up in her mother. And as an added bonus, for those of us out there who had an extra plate of stupid with their dinner, Dixon actually mentions the hair-tucking habit to Sydney herself. You know, just in case SYDNEY wasn't aware that she and her mother ARE THE SAME PERSON. Or, at least, RELATED.
Excuse me while I light my head on fire.
Sydney walks up to the concierge and, in a remarkably AWFUL Italian accent, tells him this ludicrously long story about injuring herself or something and how the last hotel she was at sucked rocks and how she hopes this one will be better. Meanwhile, Dixon's hacking into the hotel reservation system from the phone booth. Syd keeps the concierge busy by boring him with further details as Dixon deletes someone else's reservation so that Syd's shows up. Now, call me crazy, but couldn't they have done this BEFORE they arrived? I realize it looks all cool and shit, but -- I don't know, I think this could have been taken care of before they even left United States soil.