Episode Report Card Potes: B | 18 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT I Cry When I Wanna Cry
By Potes | Season 5 | Episode 9 | Aired on 07.28.2013
Back inside, Teresa thanks Caroline for coming even though she did nothing but participate in a snowball fight. Caroline's just glad that she entered a happy place. Teresa gives rave reviews of family therapy as Kathy sulks. Melissa attributes their relative success to the fact that Dr. Vajayjay told each of them to shut the fuck up at least once. Caroline is all, "Why didn't I think of that?" and files it away for the next episode of "Caroline Rules." After Teresa thanks Caroline for being there, Kathy apologizes for the things she said about Teresa's dad at last season's reunion show. She also wants an apology from Teresa for what she said about Kathy's dad, which she gets. Kathy is shocked that Teresa is taking her share of the blame and, one would assume, pleased.
And then it's time for the ladies to cook while the guys and Rosie head out ice fishing. Caroline notes that things went from violence to kumbaya, and she kind of wishes that Jacqueline could have been there to experience the magic of Dr. Vajayjay. She in fact calls Jacqueline with the news that she's in the Adirondikes, and Jacqueline wishes her luck. Chris grates cheese and Jacqueline notes how glad she is that she stayed put in Franklin Lakes with no storyline.
We then join the dudes and Rosie as they go on an ice fishing expedition with instructor Donald Vilmar. Juicy asks what you do if you have to poop while ice fishing. Of course he does. Rosie asks if people die on the lake, and Mr. Vilmar says that they do, every year! Glimmer of hope! They all sit on buckets in the middle of the frozen lake, and Joe tells us how fabulous it is that his anger is finally gone. Back at the castle, the ladies cook Bolognese sauce and mushrooms with sherry sauce. It's like old times, says Teresa! Including the time-honored family tradition of Melissa standing around and being useless.
Out on the ice, Richie asks who they all think won the previous day's fight. Juicy says that they made up and are good, while Joe says that he was digging for Juicy's balls but couldn't find them. Mr. Vilmar, who I'd imagine is no stranger to shrunken balls, starts to look very disturbed. Joe then talks smack about Juicy's small dick, and Juicy asks Joe if he's going to cry again, and Rosie and Richie start to look nervous. Where is Dr. Vajayjay to tell them to shut the fuck up? Or some sort of super ice-shark to pull them down into the depths of the frozen lake? But no worries. Richie breaks the tension by talking about Rosie's pubic hair. And I quote: "I thought I was walking out on Soul Train after I seen that afro." Of course everyone thinks this is HILARIOUS, except for poor Mr. Vilmar.