Episode Report Card Potes: B | 18 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT I Cry When I Wanna Cry
By Potes | Season 5 | Episode 9 | Aired on 07.28.2013
In Franklin Lakes, Chris and Jacqueline stop trading masturbation horror stories long enough to talk about what might be happening in the Adirondikes. Chris wonders what would happen if everyone came back happy and Teresa wanted to make amends with Jacqueline. Jacqueline reminds Chris that he said the Giudices were pieces of shit, and she doesn't want them back in her life. She tells us that this is no argument, but the end of a friendship, and she's fine with that. Caroline weighs in via interview to say that Jacqueline does miss Teresa, but doesn't miss the conflict and the hurt that their relationship entailed. We cut to the Adirondikes, where Teresa says that if she does try to make amends with Jacqueline, it will be for Nicholas. Caroline only wants her to do it if she's doing it for herself. She came for Teresa's family, she says, but she's not going to leave her own behind. Eventually, Teresa agrees to the deal, and then her trust fall with Caroline is totally uneventful and disappointing. Not worth it! The scene ends with Joe Gorga throwing Melissa over his shoulder and taking her upstairs so they can bone. Charming!
Teresa and Juicy share a moment by the fire after everyone else goes to bed, and Juicy tells her that they have to give Jacqueline and Chris a pass and make amends. Teresa starts going on about the mean tweets, but Juicy doesn't want to hear it -- they're going to make amends and that's it. Juicy belches the wisdom that if she keeps bringing up the past, nothing will get resolved. He wants her to forgive Jacqueline. Teresa starts crying again, to Juicy's obvious disgust. But Teresa doesn't know how to get past whatever Jacqueline did to her. Meanwhile, Jacqueline frames the dissolution of their friendship as a lifestyle change. Juicy points out that Joe charged him, and he got past it, so the least Teresa can do is give forgiveness a shot. He says that it's time to end the bullshit. He doesn't like to get into these conversations, because he does have a soft heart and get emotional. He wipes his face, in a sort of approximation of feeling. Teresa says that she made him cry, to which he responds, "You didn't make me cry, bitch. I cry when I wanna cry." So, charming as usual. To top it off, Teresa suggests that they go take a Jacuzzi bath, and Juicy makes the same gross laugh as when he was on the phone in Napa talking about his cunt wife. Ah, memories.
Next week: Melissa runs over her kids with some big construction vehicle. Rosie encounters swingers. Caroline and Al are perhaps on the rocks, and Jacqueline and Teresa have a tete-a-tete without the aid of Dr. Vajayjay.