Episode Report Card Potes: B | 18 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT I Cry When I Wanna Cry
By Potes | Season 5 | Episode 9 | Aired on 07.28.2013
When we return, Teresa has coerced Juicy into joining the family therapy session by telling him that Dr. Vajayjay is hot. Hey, you can't say that she doesn't know him. Juicy introduces himself as the only normal one there. Already rich with irony! Dr. Vajayjay asks what happened yesterday, and Juicy says that Joe might have felt a little intimidated when Juicy entered the room demanding an apology to Teresa, and charged him. They talk a little about how Kathy didn't want to break her new nose, and then Dr. Vajayjay asks where the passion is coming from. She asks Juicy if he finds himself often being drawn into the siblings' quarrels, and if he may overreact to protect Teresa. Juicy says that he doesn't like that Joe calls Teresa names, so will stick up for her. But who is there to stick up for Teresa when Juicy calls her the C-word? Only her limited brain capacity. Dr. Vajayjay thinks that other issues must be at play, and that he charged for a reason. Juicy corrects that he did not, in fact, charge at Joe, and of course the tape bears him out. He says that he didn't want the fight to happen, and then they debate for a minute about whether Juicy hates Joe. Juicy claims that he does not, except maybe during all the times when he does.
Dr. Vajayjay asks how the foursome can better stick together as a family. Juicy starts to say that they'll have to see what happens, and Dr. Vajayjay asks him to please play along. She also suggests that he tell Joe he's sorry if Joe ever felt betrayed by him. Juicy does, but only because he wants to leave. His exact words are, "Sorry if I betrayed you. Get over it." So heartfelt! What a giant of emotional and mental health! They do hug, and when Joe asks Juicy to apologize to Melissa, Juicy first tells him to shut the fuck up, but then does apologize, in a somewhat cursory manner. Teresa cries from happiness, and tells us that this is the first time in a year that she's felt hopeful that she and Joe can work it out. Juicy leaves, and everyone else hugs Dr. Vajayjay. Teresa attributes her success with the group to the fact that she's Italian, and then they all take a naked dip in a hot tub full of marinara.
Then we're outside with the Wakiles, and Rosie notes that you can ice fish on the nearby lake. Richie agrees to do it, if Dr. Vajayjay comes. He then attributes the two Joes' willingness to participate in therapy to Dr. Vajayjay's hotness, which isn't far off. He theorizes that they're talking about not getting enough love from their mothers and needing a hug from deep in Dr. Vajayjay's bosom, which shows a tactical acumen not seen in the Joes Gorga and Giudice. Dr. Vajayjay then comes out with a report, and to bid the crowd adieu. Kathy is pissed, because she had some family therapy issues of her own that she wanted to work out with a hot lady doctor. Fuck that, says Richie -- let's go fishing! It's great how he's so supportive of her emotional needs.