Episode Report Card Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT St. Martin of Ass-kissy
By Sara M | Season 8 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.05.2003
The doorbell rings, and Simon answers it to reveal Richard Lewis, who's getting into the Halloween spirit just a wee bit early by dressing up as a homeless version of Beethoven. Simon invites him in and starts to tell him about how he's going to college, but Richard only wants to speak to RevCam. Simon directs Richard to RevCam's office, but Richard can't leave a scene without going off on a "comedic" mumble-rant about how he got into an accident at temple earlier when he and Mrs. Tupperware or whatever her name was collided while going for the same piece of sponge cake. Oh, I know how that is. I've been to temple meals, and when my grandma isn't trying to introduce me to her friend's nephew who's a doctor, I'm getting knocked around in the buffet line by all the greedy Jews who are trying to get the best pieces of the dead Christian baby.
In the RevLair, Eric is talking to Annie on the phone. Richard comes in and tells RevCam to say hi to his "lovely" wife for him. On the other end of the phone, Annie demonstrates her loveliness by making a horrible face and angrily demanding to know what Richard is doing in her house. RevCam says he'll find out what's going on and call her back. "Should I HOLD?!" barks Annie. RevCam says no, and hangs up on her. Then he asks Richard to take a seat. This allows us all to again bear witness to the comedic stylings of Richard Lewis as he natters on about how taking a seat implies that he and RevCam are going to have a lengthy conversation, and he doesn't want to have a lengthy conversation, so he won't take a seat. RevCam asks Richard if he's okay. Richard asks why he can't "just come over…and shoot the breeeeeze…with a palllll?" I think he's had one too many fermented Bokus. RevCam breaks it down and tells Richard that he looks awful and his clothes look slept-in. In a way-too-close shot, Richard says that he only took a nap, and he "knew this schmata -- this material -- wouldn't hold a crease." He said schmata because he speaks Jewish.
Ruthie comes into the kitchen and notices a strange boy looking through her refrigerator. Instead of screaming and calling the police, she assumes that he's a friend of Simon's and offers him some cookies RevCam got from a bakery. He couldn't make them himself because cooking is woman's work, and, as Ruthie reminds all of us with severe short-term memory problems, Annie is away at her father's house. She leaves the stranger with a plateful of cookies and walks back upstairs.
In the Treehouse of Lurv, Lucy wears an ugly light blue tracksuit and asks Kevin why he isn't talking to her. She thinks he's bummed out because he's on "medical leave" for the rest of the week. She says that he should think of what happened as a blessing, because it reminded them how lucky they are to have each other. That's probably the last thing I would want to hear if I got hurt -- about how it will serve as a helpful reminder about what's really important. The first thing I would want to hear is "here are some powerful painkillers and a tasty muffin." Kevin smirks, and they kiss loudly and chastely. Then Kevin leaps out of bed and says he's going for a walk -- alone. Lucy wonders if she did something wrong, like not keeping her mouth closed enough.