Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Blood And Guts
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 7 | Aired on 08.17.1997
Adebisi sits on the balcony and blows bubbles. Watching Adebisi practice his puckering technique is a little unnerving. As we pan over the main area, in which you can see Dobbins if you look on the right-hand stairs, Hill tells us that the worst crime of all is betrayal. As the Muslims pray, Mershah realizes that Said is standing behind him, and sighs to himself in a the-jig-is-up manner. Said wastes no time in announcing what Mershah did. "This man is not our brother. He is our enemy. As of this moment, this man is CAST OUT!" Way to take it easy on your heart, dude. Said continues that no Muslim will speak to Mershah. "You wanted the death of another? Right now, you dead to us all." Smell ya later, Mershah!
Blah blah blah Poet-cakes. Mershah sits down with the Muslims, but they all get up and leave. Nice, but where are they all going to sit? I think it would be funny if Mershah kept following them around the cafeteria and they kept having to find a new spot. It'd be a rousing game of Musical Muslims. Mershah does in fact keep following them, as in the gym he asks if anyone wants to play two-on-two. Upon being ignored, he asks for the ball several times. He's coming off about as desperate as the girl with no gaydar on SNL. In the shower, Mershah finds Arif and asks if he wants to play hoops. Dude, the guy's shaving. And naked. Chill out, huh? Arif loudly sings Allah's praises as Mershah tries to convince him that Said is wearing a pair of kookoopants. Arif, having gotten his daily dose of the Glower already, ain't buying.
Pod Of Betrayal And Broken Hearts. Mershah, in the lower bunk, tells Said not to sleep, as he might not wake up again. Dude, wave a red flag in front of a bull, you're gonna get the horns. Said knocks on his window, and the dude in the lower bunk of the next pod sticks his face to the glass and starts watching Mershah intently. Someone who's going to forego sleep to ensure your safety? That's loyalty, people. The next day, Mershah goes to see Adebisi. He tells him that Said is responsible for Keane's death, which is far from true, but Adebisi says that's ancient history. Given all the stuff that's happened since then, the man has a point. Hell, I'm surprised he wasn't like, "Jefferson who?" Mershah says that Said has to die, but Adebisi calls him on his real motivations, saying he knows the Muslims now equate him with a nasty case of food poisoning, and, to illustrate his own opinion of Mershah, pulls down his pants and sits on the toilet. Awesome.