Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Blood And Guts
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 7 | Aired on 08.17.1997
Glynn, packing up to leave for the day, gets a phone call. "He WHAT?" Oh, dear.
Groves gets wheeled into the hospital, having OD'ed. I doubt anyone receiving Mrs. Smith's speech earlier wouldn't have done the same. It had "assisted suicide" written all over it. Gloria sets up to pump his stomach. Glynn freaks, and yells at Burruano to find out how Groves got pills in his cell. Weird to think the hacks could be responsible, since I'd think they'd prefer riddling Groves with bullets to watching him drift off to that Great Big Eat-Your-Parents Barbeque In The Sky. Glynn tells Gloria to "save that little prick." She doesn't quite get the concern, as he's supposed to die the next day, but Glynn blathers that he has to be aware of his execution. Uh, doesn't killing yourself imply awareness?
Alvarez enters what I think is his pod to find Rebadow, who says he's hiding. Alvarez tells him that Groves survived, and guesses that Rebadow misses him. Rebadow says he's learned not to make attachments, as if you do, you just end up grieving all the time. So why were we subjected to Patti Lupone? Poor Aaron. Alvarez tells him that grieving is a lot better than hiding. I could go either way on that, but it's Miguel, so I'll agree. After all, he should know, right?
Mukada gives Groves his last rites. There's a plate of hamburgers in front of him. Well, I know what I'm having for dinner. Groves interrupts to tell Mukada that he's been thinking about his last words, and he'd like him to write them down and give them to Mrs. Smith. Mukada looks touched, and agrees. Glynn says that it's time, as the cell door swings open. Dude, what about those hamburgers? That's a crime, right there! Groves looks out an open window on the way, and manages to stick his head out for some fresh air, a moment only slightly ruined by a very loud cawing from an unseen bird. Ask not for whom the bird caws, Donald Groves. It caws for thee. Burruano and someone else strap Groves into a chair. Mukada says a blessing, and the moment seems to overtake Groves, who looks panicked. A mask is pulled over his face, which, in light of what's to come, really annoys me. Shouldn't they do the last words without the mask on the face? In the next room, Mukada tells Glynn he has to hear the last words, and Glynn points him to an intercom. Burruano puts a target on Groves's heart as Groves comes close to hyperventilating. Groves is asked for his last words, but the intercom goes all static-y, and before there's any chance to fix it, the shots ring out. Inside, blood pours out of the target, and Gloria pronounces Groves dead. Mukada panickedly asks what his last words were, but Burruano says he wasn't listening. And this may seem like an odd choice, but it's one of the saddest moments on the show for me. It's just so "Cruel fate, why do you mock me?" Poor Mrs. Smith. Groves's blood pours onto the floor, just in case you didn't get enough with Mershah. That's our Tom -- always making sure we push our gross-out limits.