Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Blood And Guts
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 7 | Aired on 08.17.1997
Beecher returns to Em City. On the balcony, some Aryans grab him, but Diane calls them off. He turns around and heads back downstairs. He goes to see McManus, and asks to be moved, but the answer is no. Beecher seethes to himself. In his pod, he lies down and flashes back to all the things Schillinger did to him. He freaks out and trashes Schillinger's bed. Cut to the gym, where Schillinger enters the basketball area and starts doing push-ups. At first he doesn't see Beecher, who's working the heavy bag. Ryan and Adebisi encourage Beecher as he picks up a weight plate and puts it in the back of his belt. He walks into the basketball area, and Schillinger gets up and tells him he's going to die. Beecher, looking as crazy as Piper Laurie in Carrie: "Not today." He kicks Schillinger in the goolies, then takes the plate and clocks him in the head with it. Schillinger's going to be out longer than Rip Van Winkle. Beecher sticks something in the door to lock it, so Ross can't interfere, and ties Schillinger's wrists together -- not that that's really necessary at this point. Beecher gets a bench and puts it over Schillinger, then pulls down his pants. Ross looks glum, but Alvarez, Ryan, and Adebisi look like Christmas and their birthdays have come early. Beecher takes a dump on Schillinger's face and shoves it in his mouth. I was going to try to gloss over that, but really, why bother? Y'all know my stomach's in disarray already, and a few euphemisms aren't going to change that. Beecher cackles to the sky.
Hill: "Simple truth Number 22: Be careful what you wish for, brother. Be very, very careful." I'm finding it hard to see how wishing for no more monologues can hurt there, Augustus.