Episode Report Card Potes: B+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Mollie Who?
By Potes | Season 6 | Episode 5 | Aired on 04.04.2006
Next up is a rapping hip-hop sort of battle, in which the girls throw down with one another. Danielle starts off by rapping to Nnenna, "Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm gonna win the title and you look like Boo-Boo." Hey, leave Boo-Boo out of this. Nnenna raps back, "You are a model. I know that. But you can at least learn how to talk." The first lesson is "questions." The second is "rhymes." I mentor a fourth-grader who I love, but who has some problems with the learning, and I was trying to help her to learn her multiplication tables by coming up with little rhymes to go along with each formula, like, "Twelve times two is twenty-four, I don't want to do math anymore." And so I tried to encourage her to come up with some of her own and she was like, "How about...three times two is six...and when Tracie and Maria did multiplication they figured out that three times two equals six and then they had some lunch." And I was like, "Well, good, but that's kind of not exactly a rhyme." That must be how Nick Cannon feels right now.
Mollie Sue is next, and raps quite ably to Nnenna, "Your walk is good, you might not fall, but your head is shiny as a big rubber ball."
Next is Joanie, who's all pimped out in big sunglasses and raps, "Yeah, my name is Joanie, you know what I mean, it's me and this white dude on this here black team. I got a volleyball diva, a hot Latina, and two African Queens." It's cute even though I think she forgot that Sara is Caucasian as well.
And then, just when things seem to be going well, it's Jade's turn. "My name is Jade, the ace of spades. Furonda, my dear, I know your skin is bumpy, but my skin is flawless, and you look really lumpy." You can hear the "Oooooooh" before she even finishes. Seriously, that is rude, and even Nick thinks so. Joanie interviews that nobody else went there or, for example, said, "Yo Jade, you look like an eighty-five-year-old woman." Or, perhaps, "Jade, Jade, eat a grenade, your welcome you have overstayed. Excuse me if I'm being blunt...[insert your own rhyme here]." Meanwhile, Jade isn't done yet. She raps to Sara, "You're blonde, you're too tall for this industry." And then some other nonsense that I can't really understand but I'm sure is stupid and definitely does not rhyme with "industry." Leslie interviews that Jade was doing worse than everyone, which was quite possibly a bruise to her ego, and Joanie adds that Jade tries to make others feel bad so that she can bring herself up. Sara then is kind of the greatest as she raps, "I think I'm going to puke in a bottle if I hear one more thing about Jade, The Undiscovered Supermodel." Jade looks pissed and says, "That didn't rhyme." Ha!