Episode Report Card Niki: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Taking Sides
By Niki | Season 3 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.03.2002
Cut to Judy and Karen in the office at Booklovers. Judy's hanging her head, looking miserable. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know how to tell you," she says. With the ass-pole set to frappe, Karen's pacing around the office like a fiend. She says that Judy wasn't obligated to tell her, but "it's just not good that [she] didn't know." Judy pleads with her to understand that she didn't know Sam was married when she met him. Karen says she does understand, but this new information puts her in "a terrible position with Janine." She reminds Judy that she "vouched" for her. Judy drops her gaze and says she knew that she had to tell Karen, but she "chickened out." Karen, exasperated, shrills, "If you only knew how many of my friends have lost their husbands to younger women!" Softly, Judy asks if there is anything she can say or do to make the situation better. Karen emphatically answers, "No." She adds, "You just did what you needed to do, and I understand, I just..." She grits her teeth and tries to take a breath, shaking her head angrily. "Everybody just does what they need to do," she mutters, and storms out.
Okay, if I have to see Sam Blue shirtless and sporting a mullet one more time, I think I might have to press my eyeballs right into my skull. We're back at Soliloquy Beach again, for the next installment of the Lost at Sea. Important points here: Karen was crying when Sam found her, and he couldn't get her onto the raft because of it. Janine mocks Sam's emotional lockdown, and his inability to express anything, even after his parents divorced, and I'm convinced that she's a huge bitch. I hate it when couples jokingly air their problems in front of other people like this. Karen tells Sam that it's not a weakness to need people. "What is this, Pick On Sam Day? Didn't I just save your life, young lady?" he demands. Karen tells everyone to leave Sam alone; he's "veeeeery sensitive." Sam looks like he wants to hang himself with his towel.
Montage of Judy and Sam pacing in their respective studios. Fade into Sam at his drafting table, working on a sketch of Judy. A phone rings, and we follow its sound to Judy's place. She rolls over in bed and grabs the phone off her nightstand. "J.B., it's me," Sam chirps. He asks what she's doing. Flatly, she informs him that she's reading. "Whatcha reading?" he asks. She cuts the shit and asks what he wants. He says he just wanted to say hi and tell her that he missed her, and to hear the sound of her voice. Judy stares straight ahead, steely, and doesn't say anything. Sam stammers, "Ha, listen, uh, about the other night..." "It's too late," Judy snaps, and clicks off her phone. Sam calls her right back, starting to panic. She answers, her speech already rehearsed. "You know why I love books, Sam? Because they have a beginning, a middle, and an end. And you, you're just beginnings and ends. There's never a story with you. Just start and stop." Sam swallows hard. "What can I do?" he asks. "Okay, here's what you can do. Don't call, don't come here, and don't even cross my line of vision," Judy grits. He asks why she's doing this. "How dare I try to be happy, is that it?" she asks, incredulous, adding, "You know what else I like about books? Their finality. When they're over, you know it. Just two little words: The End." Judy clicks off the phone, out of breath and looking like she can't quite believe she just pulled that off. Sam lets his head drop back against the wall, and we have plenty of time not to feel sorry for him as we head to commercials.