Episode Report Card Niki: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Taking Sides
By Niki | Season 3 | Episode 11 | Aired on 01.03.2002
Rick opens the door to find Sam standing there with an enormous sketchbook. "What are you doing here? I just saw you an hour and a half ago," Rick says. Sam whines, "I missed you," and then adds that he wanted Rick to see the sketches before he commits them to putting "ridiculous sculptures" in the lobby. Rick starts flipping through the book as Lily calls from upstairs, "Rick, who's there?" "Just Sam!" he calls back.
"Awww," Grace coos, as she, Lily, and Zoe turn and smile knowingly at Judy. "What?" Judy asks innocently. The three burst out laughing, and Judy picks up a pillow, threatening that they're going to get it.
"I know, I know," Sam says, looking at his sketches over Rick's shoulder. He assures Rick that it's okay to compliment him, and asks whether Rick thinks Melissex will like them. Rick finally looks up from the book and asks what is going on with that. Sam lies that it's for the good of the company, and before he can elaborate any further, the chicks from upstairs come trooping down the stairs to stare at him with big dopey smiles. "Hi, Sam," they say. Judy smiles helplessly at him.
Cut to the kitchen, where the Grand Inquisition has been expanded to include Sam. He and Judy are seated across the table from Zoe, who demands to know how long the two have been dating. "Uh, well, I'm not dating. We're friends," Sam answers. Grace sidles over with a patronizing smile and says they know. "Okay, that's enough," Judy warns her with a pleading look. Zoe wants to clarify that they did actually date before they became friends. "Doesn't it usually work the other way around?" Grace wheedles with a thousand-watt smile, thoroughly enjoying Judy's torture. Judy pointedly asks whether Grace has any homework, and Grace sweetly assures her that it's all finished. She takes a seat, dropping the smile and turning businesslike. "When did you two meet?" she demands. Rick and Lily glance over from the butcher's block. Judy's eyes drop to the table, and Sam drums his fingers on the table while mumbling, "Two years." Judy quickly says over him, "Two months." Sam gets it and quickly changes his answer to two months. Lily adds that it was right when Sam started working with Rick, right? Right? Grace plays with her necklace and stares, unimpressed, from Sam to Judy, knowing exactly what time it is. Her disgust is palpable. Sam plunks both hands on the table and pushes himself up, saying he's heading out. Judy asks what he's up to, and Lily pipes up that he should stay for dinner. Sam squirms and lies that he has a business dinner. Lily asks why Rick isn't going, too. Sam quickly says that Rick sometimes "has trouble getting along with some of [their] clients." Judy's pretty fluent in LyingCheatingScum, though, and knows that "trouble getting along with" translates to "trouble getting laid by." She stares at Sam, and tries to hide her disappointment. Rick says, "Believe it or not, sometimes we find it beneficial for Sam to do his artiste thing on his own." Judy flatly translates this as "In other words, when there's a pretty girl involved." Sam smoothly lies that that isn't the case this time, and Rick picks up his lead, saying he doesn't find Colin all that attractive. He asks if Sam does. Sam chuckles and cannot wait to get the hell out of there.