Episode Report Card Demian: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Sex And The Single Dolt
By Demian | Season 6 | Episode 16 | Aired on 02.21.2004
Next thing we know, Raige is recklessly peeling out of the parking spot, sending other cars and various pedestrians scampering out of her way, and she must have hotwired the goddamned thing because the Dolt had the keys. Stupid show. The camera cranes up above the bustling street as the Grand Cherokee disappears in the distance before the screen suddenly flashes white. When the picture returns, the street's both deserted and drained of color. Not entirely black and white, just sort of pallid and blue-tinted, if you know what I mean. And what I mean is, somebody swiped the ChinoCam from The O.C., bitch. Piper storms into the bottom of the frame, shouting for her sisters before halting to wonder, "What's going on? Where did everybody go?" The Dolt appears at her side as the camera swoops back down to street level. "I think we should get out of here," he urges, as the shot cuts to a jittery hand-held that shudders around the two as they muddle through their current predicament. Piper insists she's not going anywhere without Phoebe. "She's hurt," she reminds her idiot of an ex-husband. "At least she's alive," he mutters. "What is that supposed to mean?" Piper demands. "I don't know," the Dolt lies, "but I think we need to get off the street while we figure this out." Piper realizes that The Only Hospital In San Francisco is nearby, and immediately heads off in that direction. The Dolt grabs her arm, babbling, "You don't understand -- we can't worry about them right now. We need to worry about us." Piper's about to go medieval on his worthless ass when she spots me loping out of the alleyway with my crossbow. I must say, the ChinoCam is most forgiving as far as my hung-over features are concerned. Clears those under-eye bags right up, doesn't it? In any event, I spot her, arch a brow, and note that she's "not supposed to be here." "According to the script, I am," she retorts before wondering why I'm not a pile of little Darklighter bits back in the alleyway. She flicks her Hands in my direction, but nothing happens. The Dolt latches onto her arm to orb, but his powers are gone as well. I smirk and slide an arrow into my crossbow, despite the fact that I never fired off the one that was in there when I arrived a few seconds ago. Don't blame me. Blame the booze. Piper and the Dolt immediately scamper off down the deserted street as I casually amble after them. The camera leaps into the air once more as I call out, "You can run, but you can't hide! You're in my world now!" I abruptly vanish into the commercial break wondering how I ever let them talk me into delivering that idiotic line.
TWoP Towers. Glark tosses Shack up against the wall all, "You were supposed to leave The Hairy One alone." Shack whatevers -- the pleasure he received knocking Phoebe on her bony hag ass far outweighed the fear of any scolding that might have come from Glark afterwards. Glark's forced to agree on that point, so the two head off to the bar for a couple of shots. Oh, they also mention that Piper, the Dolt, and I are on "the ghostly plane," and confirm we're all powerless as long as we're there. Thanks for the exposition, guys. You can put those Jagermeisters on my tab.