Episode Report Card Sars: C- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Baby
By Sars | Season 1 | Episode 6 | Aired on 02.23.1998
The Leery Birthing Center. Joey jumps up from the couch and stands by the door with a stricken look on her face. Jen whispers to Grams that she needs to talk to her, that "there’s a lot of blood here," and Bessie asks Grams, "Are you afraid to tell me something’s wrong?" as Grams tries to soothe her. She tells Bessie that a bit of blood is natural and demands a cool washcloth from Jen. Dawson reassures Bessie that he wouldn’t keep filming if something had gone wrong.
Joey leaves the room as Grams grabs the camera and pushes Dawson out of the room; Jen asks if there’s a problem. Grams busts her chops for mentioning the blood in front of Bessie, thus alarming her needlessly, but Jen keeps on about it, saying she knows what a lot of blood looks like even if she doesn’t know much else about childbirth. Grams sighs that yes, "there’s more blood than I’d like," but that technically she doesn’t see evidence of any kind of rupture or whatever, and Jen whispers, "In English, Grams," and Grams says that, in English, she needs Jen’s help: "I need you to set aside your attitude and second-guessing and help me get this baby out of her before, God forbid, she loses any more blood and complications worsen." Jen pouts; Grams asks, "Do you think you can do that, Jennifer? Do you think you can summon up even the smallest amount of faith in me, because if you can, I guarantee you there’d be no better time for it than right now." Um, Jen? What Grams said. And shut up. They both hurry back to Bessie’s side.
I would make a snide comment about 7th Heaven, but I can’t decide on just one, so forget it.
Bessie straining. Jen looking worried. Sars chanting the line from Bill Cosby’s childbirth routine, "Push it out, shove it out, waaaaaay out!" Bessie needing something for the pain, Jen repeating this to Grams in a too-snappish tone of voice. Grams not having any, but suggesting "something that may work better." Bessie willing to "try anything." Grams asking Bessie to repeat after her, then beginning the Lord’s Prayer. Jen, nearly crying, saying that Bessie needs a sedative, not prayer; Bessie moaning that "that stuff" won’t work on her, and Grams answering, "No, dear, it’s for your baby." Grams starting the Prayer again, and Bessie repeating each line after her. Jen joining in. Grams telling Bessie to push. Did they film this in real time or what? Let the kid fly already before I die of boredom.