Episode Report Card Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Frankly, You Morons, I Don't Give A Rat's Ass
By Demian | Season 8 | Episode 20 | Aired on 05.06.2006
For some inexplicable reason, the Glamorous Ladies continue the processing summit already in progress by exiting the attic and descending the stairs to the main hall. Piper, of course, has everything figured out -- Chrissssty and The Ultimate Retard, likely with the assistance of whomever's supposedly manipulating them, convinced the annoying little fuckers that...hey. Didn't we go through all of this shit three scenes ago? We did! Well, I'll be damned if I type it all out again. Go fuck yourself, Charmed. What is new is the Piper's realized that The Sisters Retard intend to turn the entire "magical community" against the Halliwells, thereby isolating them, thereby leaving them even more vulnerable to attack. Phoebe flees for The Hagquarters to make sure Stoop hasn't fallen for this bullshit plot point, while Piper heads up the stairs again to retrieve Phoebe's earlier list of Stoopid Magikal Kreatures. Raige, meanwhile, intends to confront the annoying little fuckers regarding the...whatever. CANCELLED!
Not!wartzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Snorf? Oh, yeah. This scene. Fugly Rufus summons The Triad to explicate the next phase of his plan. Long story short, he intends to whammy the gals with diabolical distractions that have addled their puny brains in the past, rendering them unable to protect the Stoopid Magikal Kreatures when said Kreatures will need said protection the most. And how does he know which diabolical distractions to use? Maggot Neck's diary, of course, which he flares onto the palm of his hand, and as everything that follows from this runs roughshod over both continuity and common sense, I'll be getting through it as quickly as possible, okay? Okay. First up, the witch doctors. "That should work quite nicely on [Raige]," Fugly Rufus notes. The screen flares white to whip us over to...
...The United Colors Of Munchkinland. Raige orbs in and launches herself into an annoying-little-fucker-directed pep-talk regarding...whatever, when she's suddenly smacked up with the witch doctors' obsession voodoo. She immediately orbs off to find herself, leaving a trio of befuddled little fuckers in her wake.
Not!warts. Up next? The Seven Deadly Balls Of Sin. Specifically, The Deadly Sin Ball Of Lust, which means it's over to...
...The Hagquarters, where Phoebe takes the Ball right between the Fun Bags while Stoop's conveniently distracted. She hikes her tongue down his throat. Stoop, predictably enough, is rather pleased with this turn of events.