Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The rekapture of Kiefer
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 21 | Aired on 04.22.2002
Back at the Lou Diamond Phillips Memorial Kave, Kiefer lies on the ground after a beating and has an expository conversation with Dennis Hopper about how he managed to escape death by the KieferSquad. Hopper had a double that was killed instead. Jeez, and I thought Skank had it bad when she almost took the rap for Vintage Tank Girl's panty doobie. Kiefer points out to Hopper that since Hopper knew he was a target, his double made Hopper responsible for his family's death. Oh, but wait. According to Hopper, his wife and daughter got home from a trip early and that's how they got killed -- otherwise they wouldn't have been in that building. Somehow I don't think that the families of Eastern European genocide-mongers impulsively pop home a little early to surprise Daddy. Hopper admits that he "should have been more careful." Kiefer takes advantage of Hopper's moment of introspection to give him a charley horse and take his gun. FATB runs in and takes the gun from Kiefer. He and TerrorPalmer both take turns beating the krap out of Kiefer in retaliation for the death of the Terror-ettes. The time is 8:35:51 PM.
The time is 8:40:38 PM. Palmer watches the election coverage on TV, Bride haunts the halls of CTU, and Kiefer winces in Hopper-inflicted pain. There's a knock on Palmer's office door. It's Patty with a "file" that Palmer "needed." Okay, maybe now she'll give him that backrub we saw in the previews. There's another knock on the door. It's Caucasian Patty. There goes my theory that they were supposed to be the same character. She tells Palmer that they're "ready" for him to give his victory speech "downstairs." Palmer tells her that he'll be there at the top of the next episode…I mean, "in twenty minutes." Caucasian Patty leaves so that African-American Patty can get on with that backrub already. African-American Patty asks Palmer if he "wants to be left alone." Palmer tells her that she can "work" in the room with him. AAP sets up her iBook in order to "work," but she can't because Palmer is staring at her. She tells him how bad she feels about the fact that this day has been "tainted" for him. Palmer tells her that Theo and Li'l Lisa are the real victims. "You're always taking care of everybody else," says Patty. "Who takes care of you?" Why, pie-faced interns, of course! She notices that he keeps kneading his shoulder muscles, so she gets up and starts to rub his back…for about five seconds. "If I get too comfortable, I may not get off this couch," says Palmer, stopping her. She gets really flustered and leaves. He's totally stoked. Aw, Patty! And wow, am I the only person who thinks Palmer is really sexy all of a sudden?