Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Amnesia and other personality disorders
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 17 | Aired on 03.25.2002
Back at Chez Rick, Rick has put a shirt on, but lest we feel cheated of any Rick objectification, he's lying face down on the bed, providing the camera with a big close-up of his perky jeans-clad ass. The phone is always ringing, and now is no exception. I guess Rick is so down and out that he and his girlfriend can't afford an answering machine to go with their AT&T cordless phone. He answers. It's Spawn. Of course. But now Rick is listening, because she tells him about the Safe House being attacked and how her mom is gone. Oh yeah, that's just the girl you want to come spend the night. A girl who is being hunted by the terrorist organization that you just deserted. Don't even worry about bringing an extra toothbrush, Spawn! Mi casa es su casa. Rick is predictably reluctant to have Spawn come crash at his pad, so Spawn threatens to expose Rick to CTU if he doesn't let her come over. He reluctantly gives her his address just as his one-shouldered-fatigue-tube-top-wearing girlfriend saunters in to be a jealous horny skank. Wow, Rick has a Noguchi lamp. Or maybe it's just the Ikea version.
Theo enters Palmer's private sitting room and catches him mid-nap. "How's the election going?" he says. "How's the election going"? That was the stupidest line ever. Palmer responds coldly that it's going okay. Theo apologizes for being such a Li'l Shit and tells him how he understands now why Palmer put the Ferragamo thing on hold; he was protecting Li'l Theo and not just his own ass. Palmer asks him how he found out about Kreepy Karl's misdeeds. Theo pulls out the microcassette player and plays Palmer part of his and Kreepy Karl's homoerotically charged conversation where Karl admits to setting Theo up for arson. Palmer is angry that Theo did something as dangerous as taping Karl. Theo argues that it doesn't matter as long as Daddy takes the tape to the police. Palmer asks Theo to hand the tape over to him. Theo hesitates. "Do you trust me?" asks Palmer. Theo hands the tape over. The time is 4:23:16 PM.
I wish I had friends like Kirstie Alley who'd just rescue me from my computer stress with a wisecrack-laden shopping spree at Pier One Imports. She's so wacky with all that incense and feng shui going on. Hey, it's another Ashley Judd movie where she gets to wave a gun around and fight the ex-husband whose conspiring ways are keeping her down. Heather Locklear is not an old lady. She's not. She uses Preference by L'Oreal.