Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Killing Kimmie Kegan
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 6 | Aired on 10.30.2008
But nothing gold can stay, Pony Boy, and so Wili's like, "Unfortunately, you are actually fired." Kimmie starts screaming about what about her blog and her vlog and her perfume and her fashion line and her follow-up to "Edge Of Seventeen" and "Over," and Amanda and Marc makes the loveliest innocent faces, and then Kimmie snags the basket of tico berries and totally absconds with them! This one scene is better than the whole season so far! She's like, "Zoinks!" and Hamburglars off with the fucking sizzling hot tico berries, like, that's her response to the situation. Like Wili's going to say, "Nice and unexpected, Kegan. You can have Daniel's job now." Then she throws them in the lake and puts her arms akimbo and goes, "HA!" The security dudes show up to take her away and she screams like a total freak about how they can go screw and she is not gone because there are still two episodes of the six she was supposed to appear in that she is still appearing in, I think, having gotten her ass fired this week, and they watch the berries sink below the pond scum, and Wili smiles at Betty, like, "Um?" Man, if they throw Betty in the lake that is it. I will have found a new way to love this show.
There's a poster of Hilda on the wall at her salon, that Uncle Sam thing where he wants you, and this cute guy who it turns out is the Karate Kid Johnny Cade himself, all grown up, comes in for a haircut. He has a "work thing" later, which is actually the results of the election, because he's totally this district's councilman, which you knew was basically the deal when he walked in talking about how small businesses are good for the community, but Hilda? No. Not this week. He asks if it was hard getting licensed to operate it, since they're not in a business zone... I mean, this conversation goes on for awhile. Zoning... and such.
Anyway, he recommends that she get proper licensure and she tells him to suck on her licensure and he explains who he is, and she refuses to finish his haircut, because she's an unrecognizable asshole this week, and she's like, "Archie Rodriguez! I have six weeks booked! And you're saying I can't run my own salon!" Um, first of all: get your fucking license, you fucking freak. You're on the grid, start acting like it. And secondly, he's all "Democracy in action touches each one of us, because elective government is the only way that we can keep our elected officials, and our neighbors, from taking advantage of us. We are in the process of redefining what 'American' means. What side of that are you comfortable being on? With immigration hate speech on the rise and becoming a mainstream plank in some platforms, and armed civilian militias like the Minutemen looking to enforce racist ideals last seen a half-century ago, you are looking at an election in which a major part of the fight is about you, yourself and your family, and whether or not you even have the right to make yourself come true, or have the right to call yourself an American. And if you don't vote, I'm sorry, but you don't have that right. You're saying you don't want it, and you're proving anybody who ever accused you or your family of traitorous opportunism right." And then he takes a very deep breath and runs back to his dojo until she decides to start dating him.