That wasn't great, but I guess it moved some shit along. Let's see. Ben is still confused about exactly what Sookie's game is with him, because he's a dumb boy from 4000 years ago, but Sookie would rather let him twist and continue dating him while stringing as many other dudes along. Good girl.
Arlene's hysterics about Terry's death bring Sookie back from Faerielande, and a short shitshow later Sookie and Lafayette discover the truth about Terry's suicide plans and the life insurance policy he bought. Arlene is in no shape to discuss that by the time they get back to her house -- but it doesn't matter, because Bill is there looking for Warlow and making his apologies to everybody for things like their husbands dying or his daughter eating their children. (Portia is there! But only for one second, sadly.)
The reason he's there is that Eric has escaped to him with the ailing Nora, looking for magic blood and willing to give Bill 17 kinds of blowjobs about it. This results in the dorkiest Bill of the season, a truly epic amount of dorkiness, as he tries desperately to be all gods to everyone -- but eventually comes home emptyhanded, just as Nora is at long last becoming a chunky liquid in Eric's arms.
I simply cannot stress enough how hilariously subpar that whole part was. It kind of became its own creature by the end, as we unnecessarily flashed back to a poncy Eric in the court of King Charles II (played sexily-if-pointlessly by the mean movie director from Dawson's Creek) who saved Nora from the London Plague only to ironically lose her in this new, biological-warfare, Sarah Newlin one.
I don't ever enjoy camp, which you could be tempted to call this, but this entire storyline and denouement was something wretched and unbearable unlike anything the show has ever wrought. I would rather watch an entire episode where Sookie and Toddler Eric fuck on a bed in Narnia with light coming out of their hoohahs than ever again sit through the flouncing monstrosity that is Eric flirting with a plague-stricken Nora, in either timeline. It was like the time Bill twisted Lorena's head around and kept fucking her, except you are Lorena and the show is Bill and it never ends and you don't love it at all.
Alcide and Sam and Nicole and Raccoona, too. Fuck all those fuckers. Jackson and Alcide have a dumb conversation that includes Jackson wistfully calling tomatoes "maters," which makes me want to vomit just typing that, and then Nicole and Sam fuck in a shower, and it's so dumb and awful, and then Raccoona kidnaps Nicole and her mom just in case you thought this story would ever be over, and also Sam has to come back for Terry's funeral even though if he comes back to Bon Temps he will die, because of course Sam would have to come back for the funeral and happily die for that.
Um, good things. Good things. A side-effect of fucking Ben is that Sookie's hair looks amazing. What else. Willa's super dorky about acting super-spy all over the complex, but in a winsome funny way like Bill and not a hard-to-watch awkward way like Eric or Nora.
Jason comes to Jessica and says he wants to get her out of the jail, but because she believes in Bill's prophecies -- and wants to get burned alive because she ate Andy's babies -- she says instead she would just like to thank James in person for not raping her last week. They have a nice little talk, and then because it is the weirdest possible thing that would happen, they have sex. Meanwhile Pam fucks the psychiatrist and refuses to tell anybody the TruBlood is poisoned, meaning the only people not drinking it are our guys, which is sad but interesting.
Sarah puts on quite a show when she finds Truman's head in the garden, including kissing it and there's a whole dumb crazy monologue, but at least she makes lemonade: She forms an alliance with Lafayette's old boyfriend Senator Finch to cover up the death and keep everything going, so she's finally on top... And without the Gov to feel betrayed by her bout with Jason, there's nothing keeping him safe either, so she has him stabbed and tossed into Gen Pop, where Tara protects him for about one second before that crazy jailhouse queen Violet gets ahold of him.
week: Eric calls out Bill for not crossing Sookie, while after reflection she decides to ask Ben for help after all. Proving he still doesn't entirely understand how this works, he presents her with an ultimatum. In the jailhouse, Violet takes possession of Jason and in a fit of pique, Sarah Newlin puts all the TruBlood refusers into the sun chamber from Bill's vision -- a charming irony indeed. It's going to be harder than usual to get excited about it, after this crummy piece of crap episode, but there's nothing saying the three episodes won't be as excellent as five of the seven that preceded it. Right?
CASTLE COMPTON
Bill: "Eric, what are you doing here? Are we mad at each other or what?"
Eric: "No harm, no foul. I saw Sookie stake you for me, and you seem fine, so whatever you are, I'm into it. On the off chance that you are God, can you fix this?"
He's so, so sweet and so excellent. This episode is kind of a dog, and the Nora stuff goes to an uncomfortably shitty place, but the parts where he's dealing with Bill are excellent. He really sells his heart breaking, in the first half or so of the hour -- which is impressive, if you think about it, because who could ever love Nora even a little bit?
Eric: "So how about you give her some of your blood?"
Nora: "No! It's Lilith blood! It made me a terrorist!"
Bill: "That's true, Eric. It did make us terrorists."
Eric: "Like she could suck more than she ever does! Just do it!"
Bill: "Ah would love to, Eric, but Ah fear Ah enjoy you begging me too much to render aid."
Nora: "Plus I am sitting right the fuck here telling you not to, you dinks!"
Eric: "Shut up, Nora! It's not about you, Nora!"
Bill: (Pleading look.)
Eric: "Blood or GTFO!"
Bill: (Hurt Bill feelings.)
Eric: "You are not invited to this!"
Bill: (Finally leaves, because that's true either way.)
SARAH NEWLIN
Pulls up to Burrell's mansion -- ah, that explains why he had a statue of himself, to the degree that anything would ever explain that -- and it's fascinating because in this one throwaway moment they confirm all the things that make Sarah interesting: She's listening to a book on tape that explains pretty much everything about the tricky spot conservatism shoves its women.
"...Welcome back to Elocution Classes For Spreading The Gospel. Chapter Three. Drop one octave, and repeat: God is good. God is our savior."
It's not about the evangelism, it's about what it takes to be heard. Drop one octave: Baby voice is only good when you're asking for something, not demanding it. Get what you want by empowering a man to give it to you without even knowing he's doing it, because anything else is just asking for trouble:
"Remember to be strong, yet not assertive..."
THE GARDEN
Sarah's distracted from her lesson by the fact there aren't any guards at the mansion, and then she reaches the garden, where Truman's bloody head has been set at the foot of his statue. The meltdown is impressive -- all the more because there's nobody watching -- and by the time she's crawling on her hands and knees across the grass to kiss his dead lips, you start wondering if maybe this is just going to be one of those episodes. (It is; it is the most one of those episodes since the Narnia Fuck. The Authority Shitshow wishes it could have gotten this ridiculous.)
Oh, Truman Burrell. Oh God. You were a decent, decent man, and your commitment to this cause was whole, and it was pure. But these monsters prey on the pure! Know that your death was not in vain, for it will galvanize the forces against this evil we fight. This was part of God's plan..."
She drops an octave.
"And God. Is. Good."
And maybe if you weren't tracking Sarah from the beginning, or got caught up in the crummy bombast of this episode, you would be surprised by what happens . But the thing about Sarah -- the thing that hurt the most, with Steve -- is that, like all great things, she is neither ironic nor authentic: She wasn't kidding about loving Truman, but she didn't see him as much more than a tool either. When your life is a performance on this level, you have the benefit of never having to ask yourself what is really going on, because what is really going on is: The performance.
That's why I liked her Shakespearian freakout, because it's the first time we've ever seen her performing without an audience, and it was more over the top than even the craziest shit she's done previously: The only audience member that ever mattered for Sarah Newlin was Sarah Newlin, which is the best future indicator of success I can imagine.
Upstairs, she's tossing a coin when Lafayette's old john, the hypocrite coward Senator David Finch, arrives (coughing, emphatically) with his latest assistant/boytoy in tow.
Finch: "Fuck is even happening?"
Sarah: "You already know, let's not rehash."
Finch: "It's disappointing, one supposes. We were so close to exterminating on the outside what I hate and fear about myself internally."
"That's the Biblical irony in all this! The things we are learning everyday, they're just shy of miracles. We are this close to bringing Truman's vision to light!"
When she says "Truman," you say "Newlin." Truman. Newlin! Truman. Newlin!
That's the first thing: That when as a woman -- even a beautiful brilliant white one -- you give up your personhood to this extent, when you're raised in Hamby's Eden, you're so used to switching yourself out for somebody else's that you don't even hear yourself doing it. It becomes a source of power, warped through the translation software of your own self-abnegation.
I realize this is dorky, but I always think of that song "What It Feels Like For A Girl," and I'm not hugely a Madonna person but that song is really important to me because it talks about this stuff, and as a gay dude I am responsible for managing a lot of it in daily life -- in a way that isn't necessarily feminist, but is congruent with feminism -- and that song is entirely a list of things nobody ever talks about that I think are radically important to the construction of an identity for anybody who is not the default straight male:
"When you're trying hard to be your best / Could you be a little less?"
Which is why Sarah Newlin, a cartoon woman in a cartoon carnival, will never bother me, because all it means is that she's raised her game to the competitive level. Being an object is power, as long as you know what you're trading for it. Which is also why Jason's bluff worked -- which I saw was confusing for a lot of people -- because it rested on him disrupting the illusion of Truman's power over her.
"Why would just slut-shaming her take her off the board?" is not the question, the question is, "How well has Sarah Newlin limited the number of ways Truman might be alerted that she is not a function of his penis."
"Strong inside but you don't know it / Good little girls they never show it..."
Her power is invisibility, because it's the only power she's ever had and she's damned good at it -- I wonder in fact if this isn't part of her intriguing ability to rescind invites? -- which is why she can go all Prince of Danes downstairs and then immediately call this meeting to order, in which the only item on the agenda is, you guessed it: Become invisible again.
And it's no accident that her complicit compatriot in this, her fellow gender Uncle Tom, is a self-hating gay dude from way back. He understands as well as she does that this self-abnegating performance is necessary to attain and retain power.
Sarah: "I don't want the Lieutenant Governor with his RINO folksy bullshit anywhere near this office. Nobody knows Truman's gone."
Finch: "That shit is ambitious, even for you. Should we even be talking about this?"
Sarah: "There aren't any real men around to hear us, so why not? You call your fixers -- I know all about your seedy lifestyle, I secretly lead one too -- and you get rid of this body..."
He and his gay aide share a look, because they know what she's talking about better than most. They begin to love it.
Sarah: "We release a statement saying the compound was attacked but Truman escaped unharmed, and is continuing to govern from an undisclosed location. We wipe this place down, and you cover for him in legislature, while I'm his presence at the facility and on all matters vampire."
The anti-AVL. You always wanted a Sarah/Nan showdown. Too bad Nan's not here to see it, she'd revel in it. Too bad her gay husband became a vampire, or they'd be the greatest team of all time. Too bad when most people think of religion they think of this.
Finch: "Exactly how long do you..."
Sarah: "The tainted TruBlood will be on grocery shelves any day now. This doesn't have to go on very long at all."
She side-eyes the intimacy between Finch and his aide, and they go into action. It's so funny to think about how long ago that whole "This factory was originally for making iced tea" conversation was -- and that it was leading here, all the time: To a woman so invisible to herself she could say "God" was telling her to fuck Jason Stackhouse, rather than the actual God, who wants her to be free. Who flips over icebergs as a matter of course.
Finch: "I knew you were fucking crazy, but this is fantastic!"
Sarah: "Just you wait, Senator. When God's message is this clear I am a truly unstoppable woman."
FAERIELANDE
Sookie: "I have literally never woken up in bed with a man and the sun's up."
Ben: "Me neither. Isn't this so romantic? I can't wait to be married forever and ever, ass to ass."
Sookie: "Whoa, Warlow. Do what?"
Ben: "Did we not just fuck?"
Sookie: "Get real! This is the Nineties."
Ben: "Are you saying this was just sex? Because it wasn't. This isn't just some simple infatuation."
Sookie: "Never fucking is."
Saved by the bell! Arlene flipping out, for the first time in history, is a good thing. In the cemetery where we kind of are, Arlene has thrown herself down on Terry's empty grave plot, and is having herself a time. Ben assures Sookie her light's been replenished due to their faerie orgasms and she can teleport again, so she appears -- hair looking fantastic -- at Arlene's side.
Sookie: "Arlene, stop rolling around in the grass like a crazy person. I'm here now."
Arlene: "Maybe now he can rest."
Sookie: "Maybe now you can rest, lady. Let's get you home."
"He was the old Terry," she says, and I glitched on that for a second until I remembered that they all grew up together: She really means the old Terry, Ft. Bellefleur Terry, a man we never ever met. The one they're all talking about when they talk about Terry Bellefleur. For some reason, that was the saddest moment of this whole thing to me, the idea that he was once unbroken and we never got to meet him.
"Look at me. You're one of the strongest people I know. And I don't know why you've been tested the way you have, but you always get through, and I'm gonna be there to make sure that you do. Just like you're gonna be there for Coby, Lisa and Mikey, all right?"
She tells him not to bother, and he cocks his head and swallows and tries to figure out what the fuck she's talking about. But since it makes no sense, eventually she simply explains that she knows how it's going to work out, and she is cool with that. The comfort of an endpoint, as guaranteed by her father and by God.
"There is nothing okay with the shit that's been going on in here. I was ... there, yesterday... when they ... tried to get the vampire to have sex with you. It made me sick to watch you go through that. You will never, never suffer again."
Storytellingwise this is all very iffy, but Deborah Ann Woll's take on it is that killing the Bellefleur kids is one of the worst things anyone has ever done on this entire show, which is true and which helps you see where she/they are coming from, so Jess gets very serious and loving, and thinks hard about her phrasing.
"Jason, you cannot stop bad things from happening to me. We don't live in that kind of world. I'm sorry. All you can do is go on being the sweet, wonderful man that you are."
And one final request: To meet James, face to face. Which on some level hurts Jason as a man, but he was just as impressed as she was, by the way he fought back.
THE BANK
While Nicole and Sam fuck for one million boring hours in the shower -- a classic cheap move to make her later peril matter more, or at all -- Sookie and Lala crack open the safe deposit box, where of course there's simply a life insurance policy for a lot of money, and realize the whole thing was a fraudulent suicide trick like in every movie ever made. (Except Double Indemnity, where it was the same trick with a different reason, with the benefit of having Barbara Stanwyck acting more Stanwycky than in any other movie.)
Lala: "I guess this is what you do if you believe it's the best thing for everybody."
Sookie: "When is leaving your family behind ever the best thing?"
Lala: "Sorry I tried to kill you when your dad was in my body, is the actual answer to what you're asking."
JACKSON HERVEAUX
Or maybe it's a lead-in to this scene, where Jackson and Alcide grunt stupidly at each other for approximately a Nicole/Sam Shower Fuck amount of time. Jackson infuriatingly calls tomatoes 'maters, is the only thing of note that happens here; I guess the point is that Jackson dropped out of the Packmaster rat race and wants Alcide to do the same, but the counterpoint is that Jackson looks like a loser (because he is a total loser) and because Alcide can't admit how much he gets off on being Packmaster.
That he is succeeding at being King in a way his father couldn't, which would lose all value if he could allow himself to comprehend that Jackson literally doesn't want to be King -- that it's fatherly concern and not sour grapes. (Or in this case, sour 'maters.)
Meanwhile, Sam and Nicole carry on a heartfelt and endless goodbye once her mom arrives at this same motel where they are "hiding out." Jurnee Smollett-Bell was one of the most exciting names to come up this spring, as far as guest stars, and I am so sorry that I hate Nicole so much, but at least we get to see her beautiful smile every now and then. Something very special about that girl, there always has been.
JESSICA & JAMES
I think it's just the script, but I really can't get into this stuff at all. This whole situation is weird to me and I don't know why, except going by what Jessica actually says -- and to be fair, she's a lot more explicit in this episode about what her deal is, post-massacre, than she has been. I believe it's possible there's something I'm not tracking, but I haven't felt like thinking about it that hard because of this horrible sense of completion: Her story's always been about negotiating revolution, busting out and slowly walking back home, over and over -- she is to "power" what Tara used to be to "constraint" or what Jason is to "intimacy" -- and her whole journey of learning what being a vampire means: She's going to the Godric place, it seems, more and more, as her final answer.
So she sends Jason, sadly, out of the room -- because he doesn't need to hear, or eventually see, anything she's got on her mind today -- and explains the first thing: "I'd done just about the worst thing I've ever done, as a human or a vampire, and I thought that if I was a monster, then we all must be. But then you did something so selfless. Why didn't you do it? It would've been so much easier for you if you would've just..."
His answer is one of the truest things and the hardest that this show has ever offered, usually just in the margins of a page: "I believe that vampires choose to forfeit their souls."
I've always thought the idea of the debauched vampire started out as a mistranslation from the time before we brought them into our homes: What's the worst thing a vampire could do to you, back when they were mysterious and terrifying? becomes Lestat sure does find ways to compensate for his lack of true sexual release becomes I guess people are just creepy inside. That's so pessimistic and gross to me, this truism that that given unlimited (funds/days/power) everybody naturally becomes a shithead. So jealous and small-minded.
But if you think back to Eric on the throne, Fangtasia! Eric, awful Lafayette-abusing Eric, it makes all this "my divine liege, my God" stuff a lot more interesting. And then just watching him be broken-hearted but clear-minded, that's good stuff too. Mostly it's that the second Bill leaves, this shit goes unbelievably sideways, so enjoy it while you can. (Particularly Bill's accent in this episode, which is so far beyond the pale it becomes its own wonderful curiosity.)
Eric: "So you can daywalk too? How?"
Bill: "Ah will explain later. Ah promise Ah am not trying to be a dick, Ah just need to avert one of Mah main prophecies that Jessica will meet the True Death."
Eric: "You realize how much it would normally be costing me, to come here and plead with you? And you realize in turn that I am not even bothered by it? That's two exponentially intense levels of this."
Bill: "Assuming Ah did ignore Nora's dying wish, what would you do if it didn't work? Because that is what Ah am most afraid of. Ah have learned Mah lesson about testing Mah divine powers."
"Do you need to hear me say the words? I believe you. I believe in you."
He whispers, his shame finally catching at his breath: "I believe that you are divine."
Bill continues to be amazingly dorky -- "Ah can see the future, Eric!" -- as he explains the whole thing about the Hot White Room and how Jessica is going to burn. (And Pam, and Tara, oh and also Eric.)
Bill: "That's why Ah'm goin' to get Warlow. Now, you know who Warlow is?"
Eric: "No! Oh my God, shut up! Stop talking! This was a terrible idea!"
Bill: "He is both faerie and vampyre. It is his blood that allows me to walk in the sun, not Lilith's. But if Ah am to stop that vision from becoming manifest, then we have to get him, and take him with us. For you were in the vision, Eric. One way or another, you will be in that room when the roof opens."
Eric: "So in order to keep me from being in that room when the roof opens, your plan is to make absolutely sure I am in that room when the roof opens? That makes sense. That's kind of an Eric plan, actually. In fact, I already did that exact thing once this season already."
Bill: "In return -- for you doing this thing that solely is happening to keep you alive and is not really a favor at all -- Ah will force your sister to drink Mah blood she already said no to."
They immediately do that.
Eric: "Sorry about forcing this on you, but I am selfish generally and grief-stricken particularly."
Nora: "No, I get it. Whatever."
Eric: "So is it working?"
Nora: "Nope! Still dying."
Eric: "Then you should drink Warlow's blood! Whoever that is."
Nora: "Everything the Book Of Lilith said has been true so far. Warlow's blood can help me walk in the sun, but it cannot heal me."
Eric: "See above RE: I don't care about anything any of you are saying."
Bill: "Fine. Then as yore prophet, Ah shall anon."
Everybody: "Oh my God Bill just go already. You are incorrigible."
She touches Eric's sad little hand, and it's very sad, and it's the last time you will give even one tiny shit about any of this. Trust me.
BELLEFLEUR MANSION
Back to deliver the news about the suicide to an adorably fucked-up Arlene.
Sookie: "Ready?"
Lala, awesomely: "About as ready as Big Pharma can make a man."
Andy immediately points out the shambling mess of Arlene and how this is not the time, and then Arlene takes center stage. It's good writing, and of course good acting.
"Yeah, I'm all right. I'm a little better. You know, before, it was like someone was... Scalping my brain away one slice at a time. And plucking out my heart with one of those little ... crab forks. But now thanks to this, it just feels like someone's crushing my windpipe."
Lafayette, who holds no grudges, walks her slowly away: "Sweetness, I got a family recipe that's gonna take the pain away in no time at all. Come on, Mama gonna take care of you." One of the rare times his mammy act doesn't grate my nerves. That was quality.
Andy & Holly: "Kids took the news about as well as expected. Arlene did a good job. Portia's [!] keeping 'em occupied while Arlene does her thing..."
Adilyn's Mind: "This is a weird day!"
Sookie: "Hey, I'm Sookie!"
Adilyn: "Hey, I'm Andy's daughter."
Wade and Rocky, Holly's boys arrive, and meet their mom's boyfriend's sudden daughter. Before they can deal with all this death and weirdness, Bill arrives with his own. Nobody can believe he's daywalking (Sookie: "Holy FUCK.") and the rest of them jump into action, hurrying Adilyn and everybody else out of the room. Portia, wonderful Portia, barks like a drill sergeant. Bill goes to each person in turn, greeting them as befits his Civil War manners, which would be wonderful anyway but is cranked right up by everybody's WTF faces.
"...I own a bar, Fangtasia!, where humans come to get off. I believe its success is due in large part to my astute understanding of human desire: The desire to be devoured, or enveloped, by a warm hungry animal. Or obliterated one juicy bite at a time."
She checks here to see which it is, Eros or Thanatos, but his boner's so huge by this point you can barely see his cross-eyed face over the clipboard. Finally, having gotten his permission to reenter Gen Pop, she fucks him. As before, it's hypnotic to watch Pam work a human one-on-one, because that's when she seems the most divine.
GEN POP F
Outside, Sarah whispers in Jason's ear: "Hey Stackhouse, I got a secret. The Governor's dead. Your leverage is gone." One of the guards stabs him in the forearm so he bleeds and they shove him in there; the starved women go apeshit for his blood and Tara, who God love her is still on this show, jumps to defend him. But then they part like the sea for Violet, who is the annoying-so-far Caged Heat lady that seems to be the boss of this prison movie, and will shortly be making Jason her prag of sorts. (Prorts.)
Firstly I think this lady (House's green-card wife) may be that thing where they announce every casting before the season and then the news reports it like it's news and then people think that it's news so suddenly everybody thinks they're going to be this pivotal character -- "Man in Elevator? Oh my God, the cast is already so huge and now one of the storylines is going to take place on a fucking elevator?" -- so I was like, "ugh, this again" and then remembered to breathe, because maybe she's just here for this Jason part.
That maybe I'm just doing that idiotic thing people on the internet do, every single season, and never remember at the end of the season they were wrong and it was just a guy on an elevator this one time, so then spring they start up bitching about it again. Man, I hate that and I hate having done that. (Unless I read somewhere I can't find now that she was recurring into year, in which case fuck that, she is awful until proven otherwise. I mean we haven't even gotten rid of fuckin' Nora yet.)
But more interesting I think is Sarah's continual idea of poetic justice: She wanted to rape Jessica in front of Jason because that's how she felt when Jess showed up at his house -- maybe even how she felt when Steve turned back up -- and now she wants Jason to die knowing what vampires are "really like." A learning experience for him that also works for her own jealous awful demons:
You thought they weren't the dangerous, evil monsters that killed my sister and turned me into a zealot? That you were smarter than me, that you're allowed to disrespect my loss and my conviction? Let's just see about that now. Enjoy your vampires, enjoy your sluts, enjoy your vampire sluts.
CAMP SHREVEPORT
Alcide: "Hey everybody, it's your Packmaster! I killed Sam and Nicole, and gave Emma to Martha, and I am the best! Wouldn't you agree?"
Raccoona: "Uh, I totally kidnapped Nicole and her mom, and it's time for a bloody revolt against your Packmastery."
Werewolves: "Yeah! We suck horrible balls!"
Alcide: "The only thing worse than regular Raccoona is a Raccoona whose bullshit has been validated. Maybe my dad is right, maybe werewolves are the fucking worst."
Werewolves: "Lay down with werewolves! Wake up the most useless character since fucking Sam Merlotte!"
OH & THEN THIS BS
Eric weeps bloody tears, praying to Godric to save Nora, and we have a flashback to the time that Nora had the London Plague of 1665 so the mean drunk director from Dawson's Creek sent Eric to go get her and for pretty much no reason at all he decided that Nora was super rad and he should take her to Godric and then he did.
Eric is wearing a Lestat wig, first of all, so he looks like Dyan Cannon. And second of all, in all the accents of the world he has done -- from the occasional Kermitty outburst to his "nerdy human" thing he's busted out a couple times, to whatever flashback -- his idea of a Restoration courtier is by far the most foul. Lispy and revolting and commedia and just awful. I mean, that's the role he's playing -- as a spy in Charles II's court and general fag-about-town -- but my God is it skin-crawling to listen to. Second of all, Nora with either plague looks like an even more haggard and inbred Keira Knightley -- which I didn't even know was possible -- so that's fucking insufferable.
I don't even want to talk about it. Whatever, she had the plague and she turned into a vampire and he loved her so much that we never heard about her, ever, because she was in the Authority or whatever, and Nora never had a chance to suck less than she ruled, and now she is dead, and it is doing Eric no favors, and this show does flashbacks worse than Angel did flashbacks, and I hate absolutely everything, and let's move on.
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