Tom explains that last night was "the highest level of performance ever seen" due to the high scores. I don't know that the judges' generosity necessarily reflects the highest level of performance ever. Frankly, I don't know that the public's voting preferences reflect the highest level of performance. Anyway, tonight will be the cruelest cut, according to Tom. Let's get to it!
Sam claims that all of the remaining couples "deserve" to go to the finals. Should she really be saying that? Because now whoever does get cut could lodge a complaint with the National Reality Show Dancing Federation or something. After Apolo and Julianne's first dance, Julianne is so fired up that she starts giggling and then actually snorts. Len didn't like their raunch, but Apolo didn't care. Laila and Maksim were the first couple to get a perfect 60 for the night. Ian came into the finals without ever getting a 10 before, and garnered one for his first dance from Len of all people. The pressure off, he did a fantastic jive and ended up with a perfect score for it from all three judges. Joey was on the comeback trail after being in the bottom two last week, and he also earned a perfect 60 for the night. Afterwards, he was still nervous about going home because of what happened last week. As a reminder, Laila and Joey were tied at 60 according to the judges, Apolo was right behind with 59, and Ian was at 58.
Let's hear what the judges thought about last night and who they would like to see again! Len thought it was the best semifinal he's ever seen, so it was hard to pick, and then he claims that he chose Joey and Kym's jive just so Carrie Ann can have Joey lying across the desk again. I feel like Joey might have pulled something leaping off the desk â his split-toe jump and split down to the floor weren't quite as spectacular as last night. Then again, last night, he had the adrenalin going for him. When they finish, Tom pimps Len's new DVD, and after seeing Len dancing last night, I would actually watch that.
Enrique Iglesias is here to sing "Hero." Gosh, I hate this song. And he's a really, really bad singer. Have you ever noticed that his features are too small for his face? It's like he's got extra head left over. Performing are Alec and Edyta, and Karina and Louis. Hey, I read on the gossip websites that Mario Lopez and Karina just moved in together. Good for them, I guess. I notice that the male pros talk to their partners a lot during the dance. I wonder what that's about. It should be like a football game, where the coach is miked so we can go behind the scenes. There's probably much less cursing, though. Enrique could have dressed up a little. He's wearing jeans and sneakers. I think Enrique should be a contestant season. Thought I'm still not giving up on the Rick Springfield idea. As Tom tells us about the tour, there's an older guy standing and clapping for the performance and sneaking nervous glances at the camera. He's my favorite audience member of all time, beating out Peach Pit Nat.
Samantha asks Joey if he's ready to go home. He's not, but he is. That's basically what he said. She asks Apolo if it was sad to just miss the perfect score. Apolo says the roar of the crowd was reward enough, and he's made amazing friends among his fellow contestants.
What did the studio audience think? Jane Seymour thought Joey was great. Some woman thinks Len was crazy on the raunchiness, and another guy thinks Len needs to eat some bran. They show various people making their picks, and not surprisingly, each picks one of the remaining contestants so as to avoid making it look like the show is favoring anyone.
And now we'll find out one couple that will definitely be moving on. And it's...Joey and Kym. Aw. Joey looks so happy. I think last week was what he needed to get rid of some of the smug and cocky attitude that turned people off. I'm happy for them.
The greatest flamenco dancer in the world, Joaquin Cortez, will now perform for us. I get that this is a celebrity dancing show, but for me the draw is the celebrity more than the dancing; I would rather see lots more Dance Center and lots less random people dancing, even though he is obviously very talented. I am an ugly American with no culture, I guess.
Samantha goes backstage again. She points out that Ian had low judges' scores last week but escaped the bottom two, so she wonders if he's confident about his fan support. Ian says you never know. Laila says she's still confident, but she agrees with Ian, and she would both love and hate to go up against Joey in the finals. Apolo says the whole experience has been great. He just seems like such a positive little guy. I want to carry him around in my pocket.
Kimmel. The gist this week is that all of the Kimmel show's employees have gotten into the swing of things and are now dancing around at work. It's cute. At least there are no gay panic jokes. I applaud that.
God, this show should be thirty minutes, but I guess it's a bit late for that. Enrique Iglesias is back to sing a more uptempo number. I am a hundred years old. I just said, "uptempo number." The only interesting thing that happens in this segment is that, at one point when I was fast forwarding through it, I thought Enrique tried to moonwalk. I was wrong, but at least that would explain the sneakers.
Len explains that we have two athletes (Laila and Apolo) and two entertainers (Ian and Joey) left. Len decides that the athletes have a physical advantage. The other judges chime in that the athletes are used to training and have stamina. Len thinks they also have better coordination. But the entertainers are better at giving a show and engaging the audience. The athletes don't let negative thoughts into their heads, and are able to take criticism because they're used to being coached. The entertainers have more confidence because they're used to being in makeup, in front of bright lights, and on a set. Len thinks that the entertainers want to be liked, but the athletes just want to win. Carrie Ann points out that entertainers have to compete all of the time for roles and attention. Len ultimately decides that the champion will be the person who can fuse the best qualities of athlete and entertainer. That was actually a pretty interesting analysis, even if athlete vs. entertainer is kind of a false dichotomy. I mean, I've seen Steve Sanders play beach volleyball. While wearing high-tops. I think he's both athlete and entertainer.
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Because they have more time to kill, now we have to watch a clip package about what the remaining contestants think of their competition. Let's talk about Ian! Apolo thinks that Ian has worked hard. Joey thinks Ian's very committed. Laila thinks Ian's best is yet to come. up is Joey. Laila thinks you can't count him out. Ian admires Joey's showmanship. Apolo thinks Joey's experience helps him. How about Laila? Apolo thinks she works the dance floor. Joey thinks she's really come out of her shell. Ian thinks she's elegant, plus she's the only woman left, which might give her an advantage. And finally, what about Apolo? Ian thinks his athleticism is great. Joey points out that his frame is dead on. Laila thinks Apolo is her biggest threat. And guess what? They all want to win!
Tom explains that they won't reveal a bottom two tonight. But they will be telling us the couple through to the finals. Isn't that essentially revealing the bottom two? If they tell us the two couples that are moving on, the ones left over are the bottom two. So moving on are...Laila and Maks. See? Apolo and Julianne and Ian and Cheryl are the bottom two. That was a dumb thing to say, Tom. You know I love you, dude.
Finally! It's time to reveal who's going home. And the lowest score belongs to...Ian and Cheryl. No big surprise there. My husband notes that Cheryl's streak is broken. I'm a little sad that he knew that. Tom admits that he was so happy that Ian got a perfect score last night that he forgot he was hosting the show and had to be reminded to go on camera. Aw, I felt the same way. Ian gives credit to Cheryl. Samantha asks what he learned. Ian says he's learned how to dance, and he tips his hat to the remaining contestants. Ian gets all choked up as he thanks Cheryl, and he also thanks the judges and the fans at home. And he gets a clip package reminding us of his journey. Oh, Steve Sanders. When everyone else was loving Brandon and Dylan, you were secretly my favorite, you big cheeseball.
Monday, the couples will dance the judges' choice as well as a freestyle dance. The remaining contestants hug Ian and Cheryl as we fade out. See you week for the finale!
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