With Amanda and Alex as the first HoH couple, everyone wonders how things are going to play out, including the HoH couple themselves. Alex admits that he has mixed feelings about having won, because it means he and Amanda are going to have to nominate people for eviction. Parker says that he and Jen, the former "power couple," have gone from being "Brad and Angelina" to "Kathy Griffin and Pauly Shore." What's dude got against Kathy Griffin? He'd better not let Neil and Joshuah hear him saying that [/stereotype].
When they come back in the house, everyone gathers around the memory wall with the new pictures up. They're individual photos instead of couple shots, by the way, which pretty much confirms a suspicion I've had all along that these couples are not necessarily permanent throughout the game. Jen loudly crows about her picture being in the number one spot, which she thinks means she's going to win. Paint a target on yourself, lady. Her partner, Parker, is irritated by the move, and later, in one of the bedrooms, yells at Jen while James quietly changes out of his leopard-skin lingerie (you heard me). Jen apologizes to Parker, but the ripples are already going through the house. Parker has a quiet talk in the sauna room with Jen's real boyfriend's partner Allison, as they both complain about having to be aligned with Jen. So then Jen and Ryan come in to join the convo, and Allison lays down the law: if Jen isn't nice to Allison, she's going to spill the beans. Jen gives a pissed-off DR interview in which she says that if Allison does that, it'll screw up everyone's game, including Allison's. Did anyone tell Jen and Ryan to keep this a secret in the first place? I'm just asking.
So then Allison makes the genius move of going and bitching to Ryan about his girlfriend. Ryan assures her that he's on her side, because it's not like he has a choice. At least not yet. Keep those individual photos on the memory wall in mind, my friend.
In another little grouping, Amanda is talking to some people -- including Neil and Joshuah -- about how she's used to being stereotyped just like they are, because of her high voice. Neil is trying to politely draw her into admitting it's not the same thing, until she totally trumps anything he was going to say by, apropos of nothing, dropping the bomb that her dad committed suicide when she was 21. Furthermore, she kind of blames herself because her dad wasn't able to reach her that day. He was also thoughtful enough to leave a guilt-trip voice mail on her cell phone that will surely haunt her for the rest of her days, which was classy of him. This little scene makes Chelsia reassess Amanda, and realize she has unsuspected depths.
Cut to Amanda, happily screaming and whooping and hollering as she leads the whole gang up to the HoH room. It's got a hula/tiki theme, with saucy photos of the HoH couple together. Alex shows people a cross-shaped bit of steel from one of the Twin Towers, a memento of his father's death on 9/11. Amanda has received a copy of her dad's favorite CD, which dissolves her into tears. These two clearly have more in common than I thought.
Allison seems to be getting tired of keeping the big secret about Jen and Ryan. So they, as well as Parker, gang up on her to try and pressure her into keeping her mouth shut. It's like I Know What You Did Last Summer, Even If Nobody Gives A Shit.
Back from ads, the night-vision cameras reveal a charming new factoid about Adam: he goes by the nickname "The Hooded Warrior" because he's uncircumcised. This cracks everyone up except Sheila, who just sees it as another reason to hate being stuck with Adam. Jen wants to see it, because she's never seen one. Adam is happy to oblige, in front of the whole house. Not that we get to see it. I never thought I'd say this, but thank you, FCC.
Allison decides to have a one-on-one talk with Sheila, saying she's feeling vulnerable and freaked out, but she can't say why. Genius. Fortunately for Allison, Sheila seems to be the type to respect Allison's situation rather than going right to work picking at her and trying to figure out what the big mystery is. That would cut into Sheila's bitching-about-Adam time, anyway.
morning, Jen and Parker come up with the genius idea of inoculating themselves against Allison by telling everyone about Jen and Ryan before Allison can. Parker starts by telling Alex and Matt, who aren't impressed that he's telling them now instead of when he first found out. So now the three guys' partners come in, and they're not thrilled with the news either. I'm not seeing why everyone is so upset about this. Yes, it makes the game intrinsically unfair, but it always is, every season, in one way or another. Play the hands you're dealt, losers. Then Matt goes and lets Allison know that he knows, and she's understandably pissed that she was pressured to keep her mouth shut and then got blindsided with the release of the information. So she goes and confronts Jen and Ryan, who accuse her of planning to spill all along, and say they were only trying to protect themselves from her. Allison denies having planned to do any such thing. Jen acts like a big loud freak, clapping her hands and yelling at Allison not to lie. There's some more yelling, until Allison produces Sheila, the one person she would have confided this in, and Sheila hasn't heard anything about it. "Okay, I'll give you that one," Jen smirks, thinking she's won. Idiot.
After the ads, Allison makes a tearful confession about Jen and Ryan to Neil and Joshuah, the latter of whom starts wondering who else in the house knows each other from before. So he gets the idea of making everyone swear on a Bible as to whether or not anyone else knows each other, which he thinks is sure to work because if you lie while swearing on the Bible you're sure to go to Hell. I don't find it ironic that a gay guy is saying that, but I'm sure there are CBS viewers who do. The houseguests gather in the living room and pass around the good book, all swearing in turn not to have known anybody before coming in. Not everyone is convinced. In fact, Alex and Matt decide afterward to form an alliance, swearing on their fathers. Matt DRs about what a big deal that is for him, and how he'll never invoke his father in this game again. Because it's out of the way in the first week, I guess. They then bring their girls into the alliance (they're happy to go along, which might have been complicated for the guys and Alex's dad if they hadn't), and resolve to win HoH or PoV every other week. Good luck with that, guys. So with that out of the way, they start talking about who to nominate for eviction. The first candidates? Jen/Parker and Ryan/Allison, of course.
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Later, Allison complains to Sheila, who tells her to hang tough; nothing could be worse than being with Adam, after all. Sheila jokes that they'll get Allison revenge by pretending to be longtime lesbian lovers now. Oh, this can only go well.
The first person they tell is Joshuah, who's completely blown away. But he seems to buy it, and, moreover, runs off to the storage room to tell Neil. Then Alison and Sheila tell Chelsia, who is even more credulous. Allison congratulates herself on a "very big power move." That phrase…I do not think it means what she thinks it means.
morning, Allison jogs around the back yard while Adam yells at her around his cigarette and Sheila complains to Parker about Adam. While she's doing that, Alex provides this season's first hilarious "falling out of the hammock" shot in the background, and then DRs that Sheila is getting on his nerves with all this. He and Matt defend Adam to Sheila, and Adam comes over yelling at Sheila, causing everyone else to clear out. But not out of earshot, because Sheila just screams at him and storms inside, in front of everyone. "That might have helped you," Alex obviouses to Ryan and Jen afterwards. And Sheila goes and sobs uncontrollably on a bed. Not her bed, of course, because she has to sleep in a sleeping bag.
"Nominations Today," as the video monitor reminds Alex and Amanda. Allison is worried about being nominated because of the secret coming out, as is Jen, although she would rather have Ryan and Allison nominated instead of herself. Adam rants about Sheila putting the both of them in danger with her complaining. I also find Adam horrible, but none of the other guys seem to, so he might have a point. Amanda explains a bit about this season's rules, in terms of what happens if the HoH couple can't reach an agreement: they would get nominated themselves, and the second-place couple in the HoH competition (Matt and Natalie, in this case) would become the new HoH couple. I doubt that will happen much, but who knows? Big Brother contestants can be idiotically self-destructive, as we've seen in abundance tonight.
The convene the first nomination ceremony, and haul out the giant key box. Adam and Sheila are the first safe couple, which takes away a lot of the suspense right off the bat. So to no one's surprise, the nominated couples are Ryan/Allison and Jen/Parker, on the strategic grounds that Jen and Ryan have an advantage. So I guess a couple is going to be split up after all -- probably even if one of them wins the PoV, which is by no means certain.
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Allison DRs that she'll do whatever she can to make sure Jen goes. Ryan DRs that he knew they'd be targets if their secret got out. Jen snottily DRs about her boyfriend, "One of us has to go home and it's not going to be me." Parker's confident about having the votes, but not confident about "Jen's dumb ass" shooting her mouth off again. Amanda and Alex look forward to Jen and Ryan having to campaign against each other. Jen and Ryan are going to have to stop making out first, of course.
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