Episode Report Card Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Pregnant cause
By Daniel | Season 9 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.03.2004
Back at Glenoak Hospital, Annie is on the telephone harassing Leanne's mother, telling her how hard this all is for Leanne, being all alone. "Yes, I'm here, but I'm not her mother," says Annie, who then hangs up in disgust, because I guess Leanne's mom hung up on her, which I imagine must happen to Annie a lot. So Annie sadly trudges back over to Leanne's hospital bed, and Leanne brilliantly deduces that her mom isn't coming, despite Annie's optimism that she'll change her mind. And now Leanne is second-guessing keeping the baby again, and blah blah blah, and Annie tells her that RevCam is with Charlie right now, and Leanne thinks that that was another mistake, and wonders why Annie even bothered listening to her: "Don't you know that I'm a stupid girl who makes a lot of stupid mistakes?" And Annie hugs her, and I mean, that's your answer right there, isn't it? A stupid girl who makes stupid mistakes? Are we sure Annie isn't Leanne's mother? And then Annie starts in with the "everything is part of God's plan" nonsense, and I had to go lie down, because the reason appears to be that God doesn't think there are enough brats born into poverty to unemployed, uneducated teenage parents. Where does Annie get off promising that everything's going to be okay?
And here's a reason to make sure your idiot teenage son doesn't knock up his girlfriend: you face the very real threat of getting the business end of a lecture from RevCam, who is telling Charlie's parents that they are way past the "could haves" and the "should haves" and Leanne is in labour, and we learn that Charlie gets his boneheaded indecision from his parents, who apparently suspected that Leanne might be pregnant. But they didn't do anything about it. And Charlie's mom whines about Leanne not sticking to her original plan of giving the baby up for adoption instead of turning their family "inside out," and I'd again like to suggest the "Simon kills a kid" method of family improvement. Anyway, the mom bitches some more about how Charlie has a good future ahead of him that doesn't have to include Leanne, and Charlie, who I guess we're supposed to believe has matured into father material just like that, wants to know what kind of future his kid can expect without his father there (don't forget: all people who want to adopt children are lazy, greedy, narcissistic and materialistic, so that's not an option ["and also, single mothers ruin children's lives -- I super-extra-hate this goddamn show" -- Sars]). And then Charlie's dad is all "Thanks a lot!" sarcastic to RevCam for dropping this in their laps, and I realize that while many problems in Glenoak are RevCam's fault, I can't really blame this one on him, as much as I'd like to. "Would you want someone to do this to you if your son did the same thing?" says Charlie's dad, which completely sets up RevCam so he can say yes in the weird, halting delivery he has, that "I know this is difficult and I'm not saying I have all the answers but you know the right thing to do" annoying tone of voice of his. And so of course the parents start talking about how long they've known Leanne because she and Charlie have been together since "third grade" and I have to say that if they've been together nine years then they're probably lucky it took her until now to get pregnant. "She was a part of the family," says Charlie's dad, and RevCam says, "And now?" And before they can answer His Holiness, he hits them right where it hurts by pointing out that their grandchild is about to be born, and Charlie's mom and dad look at each other.