Episode Report Card Keckler: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Maximum Over(warp)drive
By Keckler | Season 2 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.08.2002
Bridge. Quantum arrives, and T'Pol tells him she's located May-ashes-to-ashes's ma and pa. "You better hold off -- their son may still be alive," Quantum says stiffly. God, get an acting coach, Bakula! Of course, without explaining anything, Quantum asks Reed how close he thinks he and Huck got to the computer core. "We were within twenty meters when we tripped them," Reed tells him. Quantum wants to know if he could find a way to bypass them. Reed thinks a moment. "I believe so," he says. T'Pol tells Quantum that their repairs will be completed in nineteen minutes. Because that's all the time we have left in the episode. "The station's expecting us to depart," T'Pol says. Like a jerk, Quantum ignores her and comms Trip to ask if he has their payment ready. From Engineering, Trip tells him that the canisters of plasma are ready to be deposited in their account. "Don't be in such a hurry," Quantum orders. Yes, slow down so that your Captain can continue his Sadistic Little Game Of Ambiguity.
A bot arm puts some finishing stitches in the hull and spreads on an antibiotic cream. Trip pushes a dolly of plasma into the ATM vestibule and announces what he's delivering. The computer tells him to place his compensation on the transport platform. "Hold on, hold on -- there's a couple of problems we need to discuss first," Trip tells the computer. "Naw, I'm not rill happy with the quality of sum uv yer werk. You list'nin' to me?" The computer repeats its request for putting compensation on the transport platform. Trip just continues to criticize the shoddy workmanship done on his ship. He tells the computer that they're not paying until they sort all this out.
Meanwhile, the rest of the Scooby gang sneaks into the ducts. Do they really think that a computer capable of multi-tasking so many billions of, uh, tasks is going to be distracted by the likes of Trip? Why, he ain't nuthin' but a li'l ol' shoo-fly. Quantum pulls T'Pol into the ducts, and they make Malcolm go first. Trip continues to yammer at the ATM. Finally he says, "On my world we have an expression." Oh! Oh! Is it "Fool me once, shame on...shame on yooou? Igitfooled, can't git fooled agin"? Did anyone see that clip of George W. totally screwing up that "expression" he says they have in Texas? Jon Stewart played it over and over again. So did we. We now have that Jon Stewart segment on tape. Oh my god, so hilarious, and that guy is such an idiot! "He's NOT my president!" Mathra yells out. Unfortunately, the expression Trip is talking about is the one about the customer always being right. "Mebbe y'shuld make that part of yer pro-gram. I wanna know how sumwun files a greevince 'round here," Trip giggles.