Episode Report Card Demian: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Touch my monkey.
By Demian | Season 5 | Episode 20 | Aired on 04.26.2003
Bridal Boudoir. Over on the bed, Piper cradles Quasimodo, rocking Nature's Hideous Mistake gently in her arms. Crazy Grace rays in and, using Raige's purloined voice, lies that the Dolt has returned with the Petrified Marcel. She convinces Piper to leave The Precious Done One Log alone with her. Piper eases AC/DC into his bassinet and crosses to the door, rather expertly for one who has so recently lost her vision. As she passes Crazy Grace, however, she sniffs at the air suspiciously and asks, "What's that smell?" "Burnt Kazi Demon flesh," Crazy Grace replies mildly. "We had to vanquish the minion." Piper buys it and proceeds into the hallway. Wyatt-San whines and throws up his force field. Crazy Grace croons a couple of the lullaby's lines before vanishing into the final commercial break.
Kitchen. Piper, expecting the Dolt, feels her way into the room and orders him to restore her sight. Phoebe and Raige figure out what's going on and hustle to Piper's side. Raige takes Piper's hands in her own and spells out a word. "WAWA?" Piper bleats. Raige places Piper's palm against her face and nods vehemently while Phoebe excitedly shrieks, "Yes, Piper! Yes!" The gals hustle upstairs to rescue the imperiled shape-shifting infant from Crazy Grace's foul clutches.
Like I was going to let this episode slide by without a Helen Keller reference.
Up in the Boudoir, Crazy Grace has convinced AC/DC she's really his Aunt Raige. He agreeably drops the force field so Crazy Grace can lift him from the bassinet. When Piper, Phoebe, and the real Raige skitter into the room, Crazy Grace cries, "[AC/DC]! Help! Danger!" AC/DC's force field shoots out from his tiny left fist to encase both himself and the wizened nutjob. As Crazy Grace begins scanning The Done One's future, Raige tries to summon the kid with her orbing telekinesis. Realizing that Raige can't access her power without her voice, Piper and Phoebe grab her arms and shout the Percolated Infant's name. AC/DC immediately orbs away from Crazy Grace to rematerialize as The Precious Done One Log in Raige's arms. Crazy Grace turns to face them, and -- wow. If you thought she was insane before The Log fried every remaining synapse in the scattered ruins of her brain, you should see her now. "I've seen everything!" Crazy Grace drools ecstatically. "Such power!" Piper makes a quippy remark while Phoebe slings the vanquish. Crazy Grace dissolves in a veil of fire while I shoot daggers from my eyes at the moron who came up with the terrific idea of toasting Grace Zabriskie so soon. No, I don't know who I'm looking at. I'm just glaring into space. Leave me alone.
With the vanquishing of Crazy Grace comes the restoration of Piper's sight, Phoebe's hearing, and Raige's voice. Piper gathers AC/DC up in her arms, and after a bit of worried chatter about the Dolt, The Precious Done One Log orbs Mom away from the Manor. "My nephew is a genius!" Phoebe gloats before adding, "Takes after me." Raige's expression says it for me: Cram it, hag.