Episode Report Card Keckler: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Fist Fight
By Keckler | Season 2 | Episode 24 | Aired on 05.13.2003
Quantum comments, "Promise you won't put this into the Vulcan database?" But before he gets her to sign her name in green blood, he continues anyway.Flashback. Quantum suits up, and Trip technobabbles. Trip begs to be allowed aboard. Quantum says they need him on the ground. Doing the work of what a team of -- oh, I don't know -- a DOZEN MEN would be doing? Reality check, please! Whatever, I truly just don't care enough -- I'd SO much rather be watching the Minnesota Wild. A pox on this double recap night! Quantum assures Trip that he'll get "out there" someday: "If I had my own ship, I'd sign you up in a second!" Trip says he's going to hold Quantum to that. Quantum thanks him and boards the vessel next to A.G. Technobabble. "Not too late to call this off," A.G. offers. "We could head over to the 602 for a beer." "Not on your life," Quantum says. They take off. Quantum asks Trip if anyone has noticed their grand theft starship, but Trip has it fixed so that if anyone were to check the sensors, they'd think the doors were closed and the lights were off. "But New Berlin should be picking you up in about six minutes," Trip says. Maybe Quantum can wave to that Caroline person he got drunk over. A.G. says that by the time anyone puts two and two together, they will be halfway to Jupiter.
Forrest's office. A random officer tells Forrest that New Berlin called them up to say they detected the NX-Beta. Forrest is agog, as this launch foils some of his evil plans. "Internal sensors show it's still in the hangar," Random Officer says. "Has anyone bothered to look?!" Forrest demands, and storms out.
NX-Beta. A.G. hands over the pilot's seat to Quantum, saying that he got the first flight. "Besides," he adds, "you could use the practice." Technobabblage. Forrest comms in to demand what the hell is going on. "Just running an engine test, sir," Quantum comms blandly. "Archer?" Forrest boggles, "Turn around right now and I'll do what I can to keep you out of prison. If you --" Quantum hangs up on him. "Archer!?" Forrest yells as some Vulcans walk in. So if there were Vulcans present, how exactly was this little escapade kept out of the Vulcan database -- hmm? Can you really imagine the Bermaga Vulcans being swayed by the argument, "Pretty please with sugar on top"?
Shoplifted NX-Beta. They hit warp two, and Trip reports fluctuations in the intermix. "We see it," Quantum tells him. "Your warp field's destabilizing!" Trip shouts. And we go to commercial. Ooh, this strategic commercial placement is making me ignore the fact that Quantum is alive and well in the beginning of the ep and telling T'Pol all about A.G., who has JUST died in the present -- I really wonder if he will survive the warp field destabilization! Since I'm already on the edge of my seat, I might as well get up for a Dark and Stormy. Have you ever had one made with Jamaican-style ginger beer? Goya makes the best -- hits you right at the back of the throat with its spiciness.