Episode Report Card Potes: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Don't Ask, Don't Tell
By Potes | Season 1 | Episode 18 | Aired on 03.21.2007
Cut to Marc's mother, stroking the pussy. She says that Lady Buttons stands a good chance in the show, since she's having a really good fur day. Amanda tells Mrs. Wiener that since she's not dating Marc anymore, she doesn't have to listen to the "cat chat." Mrs. Wiener says, "Marc's right. You ARE cranky when you don't get your fix." Betty's phone, which was left on the reception desk, goes off. You know it's her phone because it plays "La Cucaracha." If cell phones had accompanying scents, Betty's would reek of refried beans. Amanda opens it and sees that it's Ignacio. She tells Mrs. Wiener that she should talk to him, and that Betty hasn't even found the time to tell her dad that she's dating Marc. Mrs. Wiener -- whose first name is Jean -- grabs the phone and introduces herself aggressively.
Cut to Marc, still trying to convince Betty to be his beard. She's not having it, so Marc grabs her and says that if she helps him out, he'll give her information that will help save Daniel's job. Betty is intrigued, but Marc refuses to give her any information until she goes along with his scheme. Amanda comes up to them and asks how the happy couple is. Marc replies, "Laugh, clown, laugh!," and then threatens to show everyone Amanda's "modeling" photos. Amanda tells him that he's not going to have time to do anything, because Mrs. Wiener talked to Ignacio, and they're all having dinner tonight at the Casa de Suarez. Betty says that Marc's information had better be good, because he's ruining Meatloaf Night, which is presumably the night when they act out "Paradise by the Dashboard Light." I think Marc would do the opposite of ruin that particular night.
We flash to Betty in Daniel's office, telling him that Alexis wants him out and is planning to take over the company. Daniel asks why Marc would give Betty this information, given his history of making her eat glue, and she explains that that was all before their love affair.
Daniel bursts into Alexis's office, where Nick Pepper, Alexis's new assistant, greets him gushingly. Nick says that he's been following Daniel's career since he graduated from Cornell, and wants to be Daniel in five years. Daniel tells him to buy more expensive ties and sleep with a few models, and he'll be halfway there. Nick Pepper gives a big "Yes!" He seems like a real douche.
Daniel walks in to see Alexis and notes that, with a new office and new assistant, she doesn't seem like she wants nothing to do with Mode. Alexis says that she can't bear to lie to Claire anymore, so if she and Daniel working together makes their mom happy, she'll do it. She says that she'll even follow Daniel's lead. Daniel says that Alexis isn't fooling him, and that he's not the kid brother she used to push around. She says that, given the cleavage, she's not his big brother anymore. Besides, she adds, it's not about them; it's about Claire. Daniel says that if he agrees, he wouldn't be working for Alexis. She says that she knows, and that it will be 50/50. She asks what she can do. Daniel says that the issue is almost put to bed, but that he hasn't written the letter from the editor yet. He suggests that they each write one, and that they'll be printed side by side. He needs 400 words by morning, and they'll take it to the press by noon. He leaves, and Alexis calls Nick in. She tells him to cancel his paintball game, or whatever he does after work. (Nickelback concert?) They have a lot of work to do if they're going to get 400 words to the printer by midnight. Nick says that Daniel said that it was due by noon, and Alexis says that Daniel also thought they'd be sharing control of the magazine 50/50. She says that there's her issue, and then there's Daniel's, and Daniel's is never going to see the light of day. Nick thinks that double-crossing is hott. Commercials.