Episode Report Card Djb: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Oh, Crap!
By Djb | Season 4 | Episode 2 | Aired on 06.19.2004
Rico shows up at his girlfriend Infinity's house carrying a bag of groceries. Because if he didn't, what on earth would he talk to his priest about? And it's not like you want to show up at church and bore your priest to death, what with their already somewhat dull, ascetic lives with the writing of the homilies and the administering of the Nilla Wafers From Heaven. Rico bids Infinity's daughter Nicole a hearty hello, and she looks up from the television playing the Biography of Pamela Anderson. Gah. Poor people even know how to make A&E trashy. Infinity, whom Rico calls "Sophia" on account of her not being on the pole just at the moment, hugs him and tells him how glad she is that they met. She tells him that she's not used to having people be so nice to her "without expecting something in return," pausing to adjust his shirt because ring around the collar is a problem that affects all of us, adding, "except that one time. And I didn't mind that at all." She might have to make use of a nearby phone booth to Superman herself into Infinity because of how much it looks like she wants to tap into her alter ego and spin around on his pole for a while. So Rico develops the moral conscience that screams out, "After three months or so, I won't stand for this anymore," and peels himself off of her, noting, "I'm married." He tries to explain that he's just there to help out a little, and she cuts him off: "Could you do me a huge favor? You know the DVD player that you bought me last week? I don't know how to hook it up." So this will devolve until either (a) Vanessa turns up some mysterious receipts for expensive items she can't account for and doesn't own or (b) Rico runs amazingly short on cash and can't explain why. But Rico can't give these tertiary concerns much thought now, as he catches a glimpse of Infinity in the next room changing into her pole clothes, the soundtrack staying mysteriously subdued when we all know it should be making that sound effect of boys ogling the titties in Porky's where they look through the perfectly round hole they've made that looks into the girls shower and the soundtrack is all, "Bwoooohm!" Rico expresses sympathy for Infinity that she has to "do that" for a living, as she walks back into the room still tying her scrimmy clothes over her naughty lady parts. Because that house clearly has no desire to win the Oscars of Doors.
"I just figured nobody knows more about crazy people than I do. I was raised by them. I am one of them." Awwww, look, everyone! Brenda's in crazy remission again. I love it when that happens. She's out to dinner with Justin Ther-not, eating sushi among numerous bamboo shoots. Joe promises that she'll "make an excellent therapist," which it sounds like Brenda already knows. He then abruptly changes the subject because he knows somewhere deep down inside what we all know: just because I've spent the past five years writing about television, it doesn't mean that I'm qualified to fix the picture tube. It's just a different area of expertise, is all. "So, what day is it?" Joe asks, changing tacks. "Seventy-eight?" Brenda tells him that it is, in fact, "sixty-seven," flirting, "Those two weeks you were in San Jose don't count." But Joe insists that they count the days he was in San Jose, responding, "Think of it as time off for good behavior." She feeds him a piece of sushi because audience-alienating obscure mathematical references is the perfect spice for eel.