Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The incidental gay sex episode
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 5 | Aired on 12.10.2001
Hey, let's really spice up the plotline with yet another look inside the super-exciting Palmer campaign headquarters. Palmer calls Reporter Maureen and asks to meet with her to discuss the story about Theo. Maureen is asleep, but one gets the feeling that she's been drowsy in the presence of Palmer before, if you catch my drift. She promises to meet him in ten minutes in the third floor conference room. For some reason she's a guest in this hotel too. After they get off the phone, Palmer stares off into the distance through the diaphanous-curtain-draped glass walls really hard like he's either going to kill Reporter Maureen or have sex with her again. But don't worry -- that won't happen; after all, this is the Palmer plotline.
Back at the hospital, a male African-American police officer asks Bride of Kiefer and AllegedYork some questions about their daughters and where Spawn might be. Bride reaches into her chocolate brown Coach purse to get a contact number for the owner of Bad Teen Convertibles, because for some reason she thinks this will help the police shed some light on Evil Frat Boy #2 and his intentions, like, there'd better be a damn good justification coming for these multiple mentions of the owner of Bad Teen Convertibles, because I am getting sick of hearing about him. As she digs through her purse, her cell rings. It's Kiefer from the empty police station office. He tells her that he's about to talk to someone who may have information about the whereabouts of Spawn. "One of the police officers?" asks Bride. "I don't know," says Kiefer. "A man." And like every other cell phone conversation between Bride and Kiefer, it ends before either party gets any vital information from each other and with an empty promise from Kiefer to "call soon." Mason enters; he doesn't look happy. Apparently, SoOMG will only talk to Kiefer. Does Mason give the refrain about what Kiefer "has"? He doesn't have to. Reluctantly, Mason allows Kiefer to kwestion SoOMG himself.
Kiefer enters the "interrogation room" and sits down across from SoOMG at a Modotti Table ($850) on a Emeco Naval Side Chair ($270 -- both available at DWR.com). A rather hi-tech-looking halogen light fixture shines brightly from above -- you know, for that whole "third-degree" thing that's going to happen? Mason and a bunch of other police people stand on the other side of the one-way mirror and listen in. In a very krafty move, Kiefer leans in and whispers something to SoOMG. Whatever Kiefer says, SoOMG reacts to this violently and starts fighting with Kiefer and demanding his constitutionally ordained phone call. Kiefer pins him against the wall and puts something into his mouth. Incidentally, as I'm recapping this scene and leaving shots of Kiefer and SoOMG's sweaty embraces up on freeze frame, my boyfriend keeps walking past my computer, wanting to know what the hell I'm watching. Soon, lots of policemen file in to restrain SoOMG. "Great job," says Mason sarcastically. The interrogation is a failure, thanks to the rule-breaking antics of the Kiefer. Or is it? Kiefer runs to a private room and waits.