Episode Report Card Gustave: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The incidental gay sex episode
By Gustave | Season 1 | Episode 5 | Aired on 12.10.2001
The time is 4:02:58. The Kiefmobile is in hot pursuit of the police caravan that is bringing Shooter of Officer Macy Gray back to the precinct. Who the heck is Megalyn Echikunwoke? These credits are hysterical. The Kiefmobile tailgates the patrol car with SoOMG in the back. SoOMG looks back at Kiefer. Kiefer looks at SoOMG. They want each other.
Bride of Kiefer bursts into the emergency room waiting room of the Frederic Fekkai City Hospital -- complete with perpetual crying baby on the soundtrack -- demanding to see her daughter. Mr. York demands to see his daughter. A very very harried nurse tells them about a Jane Doe brought in. They so non-believably manage to evade security and run down some corridors and find the very O.R. where PMMS is receiving her seaweed wrap. Mr. York recognizes his daughter, registers her living status, and develops an ambiguous facial expression. But then he remembers his manners and tells Bride that he's sure Spawn'll turn up. Bride's cell phone rings. It's Kiefer in the Kiefmobile. They finally touch base. Bride tells Kiefer about Spawn calling and being in trouble and Janet being at death's door. She wants Kiefer to come to the hospital and be with her. Kiefer is all, "I'm trying to find Spawn." Bride is all, "What do you mean you're trying to find Spawn? I've been trying to find Spawn all evening!" Kiefer is all, "You are going to have to trust me." He gets off the phone and stares at SoOMG through the back of the cop car some more. Bride watches PMMS struggle for her life.
Back at the parking lot where the Evil Frat Boys handed Spawn over to Gaines during the last episode, Gaines makes a cell call. After he hangs up, he announces there's been a change of plans and instructs the boys to drive to the compound to collect payment. Gaines gets into his Lexus, and Rick suggests to Evil Frat Boy #2 that they disappear before they become caught in their lie about PMMS's non-death. EFB2 is all, "No way, we got twenty Gs coming!" Oh and Rick "owes" EFB2, so he's got no choice but to split after they get the "twenty Gs." Like, it's so quaint that they're not saying "Benjamins" and using the dated expression "G." Like they're probably going to smoke some "mary jane" while "cruising" over to the compound in their "wheels" as well. Rick reluctantly gets into The Purple Van Of Teen Impertinence and drives off, but not without exchanging an intense round of eye contact with GaggedSpawn from the back of Gaines's Lexus.