Episode Report Card Keckler: F | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Moroners
By Keckler | Season 2 | Episode 6 | Aired on 10.29.2002
It's night, and the Dust Bowl is finally reconstructed. "How funny would it be if they mismeasured and only ended up moving the town a foot?" Mathra wonders. Ana-can't carries water to Trip and gripes about having to hide from the Klingons. Trip thinks it's a good idea. "But I want to help, I can shoot a shib'a lizard from forty meters," Ana-can't whines. This ain't like shooting womp rats back home, kid. Trip says, "Malcolm's got this rule -- you gotta be taller than the gun to use it." What does that say about phase pistols, then? "I don't want to hide," the kid repeats. "Well, shootin' at a lizzerd's a whole lot diffren' than shootin' at a person. And, uh, lizzerd's don' shoot back," Trip tells him. Look, if the kid insists on not hiding, let him run around to draw the Klingon fire -- I don't really have a problem with that. Trip gets more father figure than George Michael when he says, "When those Klingons show up, I want you to do 'zactly as Lewtennent Reed says -- unnerstood?" Ana-can't yes-sirs him.
Hoshi and Reed look on proudly as the Dust Mites fire at the ceiling.
Quantum and Trip weld things. Because they're MacGyver and the A-Team rolled into one.
Morning. Quantum's donned a groovy earthtone headband; he puts some finishing touches on a rock pile. Meanwhile, Leader of the Dust Mites sits alone in his tent and mopes. Quantum walks in and startles him back to his polishing of what looks like a Dustbuster. The playground's ready for the bullies. Leader of the Mites hopes everyone survives, so Quantum takes the opportunity to tell a little tale of Suliban and leg wounds, " of cabbages and kings. "Just before I passed out, I remember thinking, 'This isn't what I signed up for [that's exactly what I thought at the end of last season -- how weird is that?!] -- I should be mapping star clusters or making First Contact with friendly species.' But when those Suliban started firing at my crew, I knew I didn't have any choice but to fight back. I'm not ashamed to admit I was nervous -- I'm nervous now but I know we can do this," Quantum says, nary a furrow in site. What exactly are they nervous about? Doesn't Enterprise have a crew complement of eighty? And since Quantum mentioned earlier that the Dust Mites outnumber the Klingons "seven or ten to one," that seems like sizeable number to fight with. But what do I know? I'm just married to a mathematician, is all. "Don't-don't do the gazelle thing again," Mathra pleads, throwing himself prone in front of the VCR. I have no idea what he's referring to. May-Off-Site-Injections comms the news that the Klingon ship just dropped out of warp. Quantum looks at Leader of the Mites, who cracks me up with his sudden facial resolve to be stalwart and sure.