Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Sister Long-Legs
By Jacob Clifton | Season 4 | Episode 2 | Aired on 06.18.2013
Hanna: "It is the third book I have ever read and let me tell you, it is a slog."
DILAURENTIS HOUSE
Hanna: "Spencer! I'm still in a shitty mood! Also, I'm outside your house. Where are you on a Saturday morning? Writing essays for safety schools? Call me back or else!"
Jessica DiLaurentis: "Hanna! Waddle on over here and give me a hug."
Hanna: "Mrs. D. I see you're wearing the best costume for the day."
Jessica: "Gardening is meditative! Give me advice about the aesthetics."
Hanna: "I have no opinion other than the fact that it's astonishing how much of this show is about somebody digging around in this yard."
Jessica: "It is not even the weirdest thing going on in this scene. Have you met our parrot Tippi?"
Hanna: "Oh, like the Hitchcock movie with birds. That's funny."
Jessica: "No, it's because Alison couldn't pronounce Pippi Longstocking, her literary forebear."
Hanna: "You're about to tell me she speaks with my dead friend's voice, aren't you."
Jessica: "They were roommates at Mother D's old-people-stinking house in Georgia. She probably hung out with that bird more than her grandmother."
Tippi: "It's immortality my darlings! Squawk!"
Hanna: "Yep. Nothing worse than birds."
Jessica: "She's probably going to call you fat. That's what I would do."
Tippi: "Squawk! I only kill when we need food! Bawk!"
COLLEGE ESSAYS
Fitz: "Spencer what the hell."
Spencer: "What? It was a weird question, it got an honest answer. Discuss one situation in which you were right, and wish you hadn't been. That is literally 100% of my life."
Fitz: "You've been good at playing the game this whole time, why now are you suddenly telling the weird truth? I question whether this is something you'd want to share with an admissions committee."
Spencer: "BUT WHY."
Fitz: "How can I put this. Um, I think colleges -- now more than ever -- are concerned with ... emotional stability."
Spencer: "If I were going to go on a shooting spree, Mr. Fitz, we both know it would have happened by now."
Fitz: "Trust me. We had meetings. But these people don't know your history, they only know what you're telling them. It's not really about expressing yourself, it's about gaming the system."