Episode Report Card Wing Chun: B+ | 40 USERS: B- YOU GRADE IT "My Husband's Back And He Phases Through Solid Matter"
By Wing Chun | Season 1 | Episode 6 | Aired on 2006.10.30
The Bennett doorbell rings, and a painfully high-strung Sandra hurries to answer, calling to Claire that her guests have arrived. Bennett appears in the foreground of the shot, glancing from the introductions at the door back to Claire, who smiles reassuringly. We pull back even further to see that Zach is still there; as he gathers his things, he offers to shove Claire's faux-rents into something on his way out. "Ha ha," smiles Claire, and he splits with a couple of pink bakery boxes of cupcakes. Those poor bastards are going to get their frosting all smeared. He needs this!
Back in the land of dark and mumbles, D.L. is like, "How are we going to do this?" "We don't," Niki tells him. "You're couching me?" D.L. asks incredulously. Hey, at least she's getting out bedding for him. If it were me, anyone who interrupted my sleep would have gotten a kick to the crotch by now -- and if it had been someone who'd ever lived in the house, I'd be like, "You know where the linens are. If you sweat and drool on my bare couch, I'll cut you." Niki's pissed that D.L. left her for six months, but he protests that he didn't want to. She tells him that it wouldn't have happened if not for his crazy caper, before which they were "making it." "Thirty grand a year, doing construction," D.L. spits. Hey, she did the best she could! How much cement do you expect her to be able to lift with those bandy little arms. But also, isn't Las Vegas, like, permanently under construction everywhere? If D.L. couldn't make more than $30,000 doing construction there, maybe he should have learned to deal blackjack. Niki complains that $30,000 wasn't enough for D.L., who counters "that business doesn't fly when you have a family." (a) What? (b) Why didn't he suggest that she also get a job before turning to a criminal alternative when, CLEARLY, he has no aptitude for it? Anyway, Niki stomps forward and meaningfully announces, "When you left, I became another person." Ha! Rejected ways of phrasing that sentiment include "When you split, so did I"; "Whatever you suffered, that goes double for me"; "Having you gone has given me a lot of time to reflect"; and "One might say that your experience of being imprisoned was mirrored by mine." D.L. says he doesn't care that Niki "took off [her] clothes on the internet" (and, seriously. Who hasn't?): "Look, you did what you had to do." Survive or perish, GET IT?! Niki wearily tells D.L. that he can stay there tonight, but that he has to leave in the morning. "If that's what you want," he replies. He moves to kiss her, but she turns her face away.