Episode Report Card Aaron: B | 791 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Baldness <> Death
By Aaron | Season 6 | Episode 6 | Aired on 2003.02.09
The actual execution itself turns out to be sort of a Thirty-Two Short Films About Cyril Getting Fried-type scene, as each of the characters gets his or her own little silent moment to react to what's going on. Sister Pete looks like she got a new perm just for the occasion. Dr. Nathan looks like she's conflicted about watching the execution of the man who killed her husband (wow. Say hello to my other old friend, Prisoner #03S-6610: Continuity Q. Steinberg. Convicted February 8, 2003 -- Drunk and Disorderly. Sentence: Three days (suspended). Up for parole in sixty seconds). Ryan paces the meditative maze. Cyril smiles as he helps the guards buckle him into the chair. Leo looks sadly resigned, especially after Cyril's last words turn out to be "Huh?" And then, just when you think you can't take the tragedy of it all anymore, the red bat-phone in the back of the room starts to ring, and suddenly Leo steps forward to announce that Cyril has received a stay, and the execution has been cancelled.
In case you're curious, here's a roughly transcribed version of my actual response while watching the episode: "What?! You're shitting me, right? All that for nothing? If you're gonna run me through the wringer for thirty minutes, Fontana, you damn well better fry that fucker. So, come on! Let's go! Fire up Ol' Sparky and let's get this motherfucking show on the road!"
Yeah. I've calmed down a bit since then, but I still think it was a total cop-out. Although someone in the forums did point out the dramatic irony that would be inherent in having poor Cyril live on in Oz if Ryan were to suddenly come to a bad end instead, so I guess I could deal with it if that's the route they chose to take. But once again, the spoilers prevent me from saying anything else, and besides, it's 4:00 AM, and I really want to go to bed. Hell, I can barely even remember eating that bacon I was talking about in the opening paragraph.
So anyway, we wrap things up with one last Augustus Interlude, made all the more enjoyable by the fact that he calls us all retards. Right to our faces, no less. No wonder nobody likes this guy. And then we cut to Ryan's pod, where he sets down Father Salty Shitpants's Bible and looks up to the heavens to offer an ardent "thank you" to God for saving his brother's life. Fade to black.
Only two more to go, kids. Make sure you place your death pool bets soon. There's gonna be a lot of possibilities to choose from.