Episode Report Card Niki: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT 'Til The One Day When The Lady Met This Fellow...
By Niki | Season 2 | Episode 15 | Aired on 03.13.2001
"What is she, twenty-seven?" Lily asks, pacing around the foot of her bed, where Rick is seated, watching her. Well, it's not like Tiffany's seventeen, for Christ's sake. She and Jake aren't exactly candidates for Ricki Lake. Lily wonders what the girls are supposed to think. Rick shuts her up by asking what Lily said to the girls about his staying over for the night. What's that, Lily? You couldn't hear him over the roar of your own raging hypocrisy? She takes a seat next to him and says that the girls are fine with it. "Fine," Rick says, as the Plucky Guitars of Fun strike up, just so we know that it won't be fine at all. Oh, what wacky hijinks are we bound for this time? Lily and Rick look at one another, then down at their clothes, and begin routinely, mechanically removing them. Oooh, sexay. Lily moves to the closet and says that Rick can hang his things in there. He says he usually just tosses his things across a chair. What, they've never spent the night together before? Lily emerges from her closet -- the walk-in closet I'd kill for -- just as Rick's gotten down to his boxers. Va-va-voom, baby. They're on the bed forming an airtight liplock in under three seconds.
Cue the tiny knock at the door. "Mom?" Zoe calls. Rick and Lily freeze, then scramble under the covers. Lily tells Zoe to come in, and asks what's up. Zoe ponders for a second before answering that she left her brush on Lily's dresser. She fetches it while Lily and Rick follow her with their eyes. At the door, Zoe pauses with a big grin and sweetly wishes them goodnight. Lily and Rick exhale and laugh uncomfortably, and Rick gestures toward the bathroom, saying, "I'm just gonna use the..."
Giggles erupt on the other side of Lily's door. "Gi-irls!" she calls, "Why don't you both come on in and get it over with? Bring your sleeping bags!" The door flies open and the kids pile in, Zoe claiming that Grace made her do it. Grace denies this vehemently. The toilet flushes, and both girls turn to find Rick standing in the bathroom doorway, in his skivvies, and looking a little nonplussed. He glances down at himself and Grace grins. Lily invites the girls to join her on the bed. Once they're settled, Lily makes the introductions: "Girls, this is Rick in his underwear." Rick modestly raises his arms and forces a tight smile. "Get used to it," Lily advises them. Oh, the sacrifices these kids have to make. I wish Rick were wearing boxer-briefs, though. That, I could get used to. Ahem. Lily tells them to go to bed, and they wish Lily and Rick a goodnight before giggling off to their own rooms. "Having fun yet?" Lily asks, cocking her head. She dashes out of bed just as Rick jumps onto it. He flops around, trying to get comfortable, with no luck, and comments that the bed is really soft. Lily protests that she likes her bed. Rick answers that it's a nice bed, but he doesn't sound like he means it. Lily jokes, "Well, that's okay, because we'll never have sex in it." "What's sex?" Rick asks. They num-num smooch and Lily smiles that she's "so glad [he's] here." He is, too. They snuggle in for the night as we fade to commercials.