Episode Report Card Potes: B- | 18 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT Sizzle Tans
By Potes | Season 5 | Episode 10 | Aired on 08.04.2013
We then cut to Jacqueline, who is out at the toy store with her other son, C.J. With all the attention focused on Nick, quality time with C.J. is important, and that's why she's embarrassing him in the middle of the toy shop and taking calls from Teresa during their special time together. Yes, Teresa. She opens by telling Jacqueline that her favorite friend is on the line, and I must admit that it comes as something of a shock that Teresa understands sarcasm. Jacqueline grabs a pretty hilarious Teresa-esque puppet and listens as Teresa says that she wants things to be civil between them again. Jacqueline says that she wants the hate to stop.
Teresa does not help matters by interviewing that sometimes you need to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Sigh. Jacqueline tells Teresa that if she has something to get off her chest, both she and Juicy are welcome to come to their house and talk about it. Teresa is not keen on going to Jacqueline's house, for fear that Caroline might once again show up with a giant iced coffee at 10 p.m. She suggests neutral ground, and promises that there will be no yelling this time. After they're off the phone, Jacqueline grills C.J. as to whether the drama in fourth grade is anything close to what she's experienced as an adult. And then she secretly thinks about trying to go back to elementary school. Meanwhile, the true sign that Jacqueline is losing it is that she didn't bother to wash her hair for this filming excursion.
And then the Wakile and Gorga families go to a lesbian bar to help Rosie find herself some poon. We get to hear Richie ask if it's called the Clam Hut, which is delightful as always. It's singles night at the bar, and there are colored wristbands indicating your relationship status. Melissa asks what DTF means, and clutches her pearls when she learns that it stands for "down to fuck." In an interview, Rosie hilariously tells us that she is NOT, in fact, DTF at this point. It's been six years! She needs to ease in. There are some snags in finding Rosie a match -- namely, that everyone the group encounters seems to be too young (which Rosie does not go for), bisexual (which Rosie does not go for), or swinging couples (which Rosie does not go for). Melissa and Joe might score with the swingers, though.
Richie finds a lovely lady named Ellen and her friend, and I'm sure butters them right up for this whole encounter. While the Wakiles and Gorgas lurk and watch, Rosie talks to Ellen about all the things she's got going on upstairs, and (I think) Kathy's desserts, and fried green tomatoes, and many other things. Richie notes that Rosie is so nervous she's getting drunk. He understands, because he's a lesbian trapped in a man's body. Yeah, I don't know either. Drunk Rosie confesses to Ellen that she's smitten, and also chunky. Eventually, Ellen says that she has to go. When Rosie gives her a hug, Ellen bids her adieu with a dismissive, "I'll call ya." I actually find it absurd that Rosie is not paired up. She's a delight! I mean, once in a while she'll displace all the cartilage in her hand by pounding it on the table in a drunken rage, but the other 70% of the time she's fantastic.